A year ago this month, Refinery29 contributed to the ongoing loneliness conversation with one woman's personal story, titled "At Weekends I Don't See Anybody: What It's Like To Be Young & Lonely". In many ways, Michelle Lloyd's story was unremarkable – the 34-year-old, who lives alone in south London, told of how, in spite of having friends, a great job (as HR manager for the charity Dementia UK), various interests, and living in a vibrant city, she often felt lonely.

What was unusual was the bravery she showed by publicly admitting to something that's so common but still shrouded in stigma among young people: that trying to maintain fulfilling relationships with good mental health while working a full-time job, during a phase when you're meant to be having "the time of your life", is damn difficult and, at times, isolating. Lloyd's story was a hitherto underreported side of the loneliness phenomenon.

Having written about her anxiety and depression on her mental health blog, You Don't Look Depressed, Lloyd was no stranger to sharing intimate personal information online. But nothing she'd written before had garnered quite as strong a reaction. The comments flooded in immediately, while news outlets including the BBC and Radio 5 Live picked up Lloyd's story on the back of our story. She was interviewed for a documentary, invited on panels and even became a trustee at Anchor, a counselling service that provides free counselling to those who can’t access support.

A lot can happen in a year – public perceptions of loneliness and who can experience it (that is, anyone) appear to be shifting in the right direction, and Lloyd's story inspired Refinery29's themed content series, Lonely Girls' Club. So how is she doing now? And did she take anything away from the experience? We caught up with her again.

"I agreed to the interview originally because I wanted to raise awareness of loneliness. Whenever I'd read anything about it in the past, it was never taken seriously and as someone who has felt lonely most of their life, I never felt like anyone else got it or felt the same. Up until recently, it was largely only discussed in the context of older people. I wanted to share my story and perhaps help other younger people feeling the same way – not because I felt my experience was special, but because I thought that other women my age, in similar circumstances, might relate to how I was feeling. I hoped people would feel slightly less alone and understood.

Honestly, I felt scared when the article was published. I’ve written quite a lot about my mental health but this was the most honest thing I'd spoken about, and the idea of people reading it and judging me or making assumptions made me anxious. There was added anxiety over the fact that I gave the interview right after I'd broken up with my partner and called off a wedding. I knew a lot of people were upset with me and possibly judging me already. I imagined people thinking I didn’t have the right to speak about loneliness when it was me who called off the relationship. But people will always make assumptions about you and it’s the opinions of those you care about that matter most. I knew they'd be proud, but I didn’t want friends or family to think I was suggesting that they weren’t good enough, or that they didn’t spend enough time with me.

I received a few disconcerting messages – largely from men who assumed I was looking for people to go on dates with.

The response was overwhelming. Nothing I've written has garnered such a reaction – and a positive response at that. Any anxiety around having overshared instantly went away as I was faced with so many people saying they felt exactly the same, and they were grateful for me having shared it. I felt like I'd done what I'd set out to do so it didn’t matter what anyone else thought. A lot of people contacted me through my blog and shared their own experiences – mostly women but some men too, and a year on I still receive emails from people who have stumbled on it from all over the world. It’s given me a great sense of pride in knowing that someone has felt affinity with my words but has also made me realise just how widespread and complex the issue is.

Initially, I responded to everyone individually but it soon became overwhelming – I felt it was my duty to offer to meet up with people, especially those in London. Then the anxiety kicked in – I struggle with social anxiety and meeting new people, and I worry about not living up to people’s expectations. Therefore I sadly didn’t respond to everyone – there were literally hundreds of emails – and I do feel that I let people down. I apologised on my blog, so I hope people understood. Inevitably, I received a few disconcerting messages – largely from men who assumed I was looking for people to go on dates with. They went straight in the bin.

I learned a lot from the experience – I realised my loneliness is sometimes of my own making and is caused by my anxiety about reaching out to people. Sometimes it’s easier to think 'no one likes me' but actually it’s down to me pushing people away for fear of letting them in. I’ve tried – and failed in some instances! – to be braver and strike up more conversations and socialise, and I’ve definitely nurtured some new friendships – some are with people that were already in my life but I perhaps didn’t put the effort in with previously. I now know that contrived socialising isn’t for me, as it puts a lot of pressure on you and feels forced. The best connections are organic and they really do happen when you allow yourself to be vulnerable and let people in.

The fact that I'm female and spoke about being lonely made me easy prey.

I've also become better at enjoying being on my own and realise how important it is to get to know yourself – as clichéd as that sounds. I now take great pleasure in doing certain things alone and don’t feel as stupid or sad as I once did. I took myself to Italy for my first solo holiday and had the greatest time – I pushed myself to do things like eating in a restaurant alone and it wasn't as scary as I thought it would be. Of course, I still feel lonely sometimes but I’ve shifted to feeling more independent and empowered. Some people surround themselves with others because they can’t bear to be on their own, which makes me quite sad – you can’t rely on other people for your own happiness, it has to come from within. I only realised this recently.

Having done many media interviews now, I’ve realised how little people really understand about loneliness. People have told me I just need to join a club or a church or get a boyfriend. Some articles have led with the fact I’m lonely because I split up with someone, which was exactly the point I've been trying not to make – of course, coming out of a relationship contributes to loneliness but it isn’t the main reason. It’s frustrating when people don’t listen and make that the headline and ignore all the other stuff you say.

There was an incident with a stalker a few months after the article was published. A man from Texas repeatedly sent me uncomfortable emails and messages on various channels and even sent unsolicited gifts to my workplace. He started off being kind, but because I didn’t respond it quickly turned into the ramblings of a bitter scorned ex-lover berating me and painting me as a selfish fraudulent bitch. It led to me self-harming again because I was left feeling utterly humiliated and hopeless. The police were helpful, but there was nothing they could do because he was based in the US. I hate to bring it down to gender, but I don’t think it would have happened had I been a man. The fact that I'm female and spoke about being lonely made me easy prey.

There's no right or wrong number of friends to have and there's no one-fits-all fix to feeling lonely.

To anyone in the same position I was in last year, I'd say: show yourself some kindness – you can’t accept it from others if you don’t show it to yourself. Don’t beat yourself up about everything or put pressure on yourself. There's no right or wrong number of friends to have and there's no one-fits-all fix to feeling lonely – do what makes you feel good and to hell with what anyone else says. But also realise that being alone sometimes can be great once you get past the fear. And watch Fleabag if you haven't already. I’ve taken such reassurance from it. Finally, a woman we can all relate to – who's not perfect, but doing her best. The way the show depicts mental health and loneliness and wanting to be loved is the best I’ve ever seen. My mantra is 'be a bit more Fleabag '."

If you are experiencing a mental health condition and need support, please call Mind on 0300 123 3393.

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Do you ever put off starting a new TV series because you know that you’ll not make it to the end? What’s the point in temporarily investing in a show if you’ll never find out how that rogue reference in episode 2 is somehow to blame for the lead character's fate in episode 23?

Sure, I may be digging a little deep here (it really is that deep, though) but there’s definitely something to be said for being able to sit and watch an entire series from start to finish and come out the other side without feeling like you've completely lost your day, life, mind, soul.

Throw it back to the time you did a 26-hour and 17-minute Orange Is The New Black, This Is Us, Pretty Little Liars, Dynasty, The OA or even Game of Thrones session, only to have to return to watch more after a brief sleep interlude – it starts to feel like a bit of a chore. Making it through shows like that is a wonderful, indulgent feat in itself. But isn't it such a treat to earn that end-of-series catharsis and find that the day is still young?

The humble mini-series has had a mighty resurgence over the last couple of years, and you've probably spotted that some of your favourite shows of the moment are delivered in compact 6-8 episode packages (we're looking at you Killing Eve, Fleabag and Big Little Lies). So in the spirit of having your cake and eating it, I've rounded up some more gems that might've flown beneath your radar last time you flicked through the TV guide. Ahead you'll find a list of great shows of which you can finish an entire series in one sitting – and still get outside to see the light of day.

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Hot on the heels of our lime green obsession comes a new shade to fall for. The next thirst-quenching shade on the pastel spectrum? Lilac. During the '90s – the era of Lizzie McGuire-inspired platforms and Lil' Kim's unforgettable VMAs look – the soft hue certainly made an impact, and now it's hurtling back onto our 2019 wish list.

SS19's catwalks gave us inspiration aplenty for slotting the ice-cream colour into our daily uniform. Victoria Beckham offered up a sheer dress (a nod to the early '00s) and Tom Ford experimented with leather parachute trousers, while in true Tibi form, the label debuted pleated, loose dresses and satin-finish V-necks paired with high-waisted trousers.

How are we wearing the pleasingly sweet shade? We'll pair crisp white straight-leg jeans and a shoulder top with an impractical but oh-so-cute lilac micro bag, but if you're feeling particularly brave, go for a statement-making head-to-toe look.

In celebration of lilac's welcome comeback, we've found the ideal pieces that will fit seamlessly into your wardrobe.

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Richard Curtis started writing Four Weddings and a Funeral when he was 34 and found that he’d attended 65 weddings in the previous 11 years.

If you're in your early-to-mid 20s, it's likely that so far, the weddings you have attended will have been family affairs; low-key dos that require no more effort from you than boarding a train to somewhere in the Midlands, signing your name in a card your mum bought for the family, and spending the evening marvelling at the amount of Newcastle Brown Ale that Uncle Sean can put away.

As your 20s wear on, though, your letterbox will quite possibly experience a sharp uptick in wedding invitations as your friends begin to announce their engagements on their favoured social media platform. This is a very exciting time indeed, for both you and your friends.

But as someone older (certainly) and wiser (almost certainly not), who's spent the last several summers in a heady wedding haze, up and down the country and all over Europe, let me tell you that there is a big difference in the level of responsibilities that comes with attending your very first "friend" wedding. Faux pas are not only easy to make, they're almost a certainty.

Ahead, with a little help from Adamantia Leonidopoulou, a senior events manager who runs weddings at London members' club and hotel The Ned, is a list of practical things I wish someone had told me before I'd first struck out, starry eyed and carefree, all those 26 weddings ago...

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There's probably one question I get asked most as a beauty journalist: How can I get rid of blackheads? It's something my friends and their partners want to know — even strangers on the internet — and to be honest, it’s a hard one to answer simply.

Firstly it's important to differentiate blackheads from whiteheads, which are small plugged follicles, the contents of which are not exposed to the skin surface, characterised by a pustule on the very top. Blackheads are small hair follicles with dilated openings to the skin. They tend to appear when the opening gets blocked with oil, sebum and dead skin cells. What makes a blackhead appear dark isn’t that it’s full of gunk, but that the sebum blocking the pore has oxidised and changed colour. Blackheads are common, no matter how many scrubs or acids you might employ in your skincare routine. Although you can get rid of blackheads short term, experts argue that the size of your pores is generally determined by your genes, and if your pores appear on the larger side, then it's likely they'll get blocked again.

However, having access to some great treatments and products means I’ve come up with a failsafe plan of action for tackling my pores and inevitable blackheads, and the biggest success is inspired by a cult-famous, industry-approved facial. Enter: Skinwork at Alex Eagle. The Skinwork Signature Facial combines a congestion-clearing cleanse with a collagen-stimulating antioxidant cocktail, a thorough extraction and futuristic-looking heat mask, which leaves your skin glowing and pores minimised. Of course, not everyone has the budget to drop on a fancy treatment (the Signature Facial starts at £140). But if my experience has taught me anything, it's that you don't have to shell out hundreds to get a clearer T-zone. While some steps of this facial aren’t really doable yourself (unless you’ve got a galvanic current face mask in your kitchen cupboard), the gist can be DIY-ed. Here's exactly how to get rid of blackheads at home.

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Step One: The Cleanse

All good facials start with a really thorough cleanse and I tend to double cleanse most nights. Experts argue that the first cleanse should consist of something like micellar water to remove any makeup, pollution and general daily dirt and advise a second, water-based cleanse to really target the skin. With this facial treatment, the emphasis is on cleansing the skin thoroughly, taking the time to massage in your chosen cleanser for a good couple of minutes, before rinsing or wiping away any excess with a damp, warm flannel. You can really customise your at-home facial with the cleansers that are right for your skin type. I like to use Oskia’s Renaissance Cleansing Gel, £33, to melt away any makeup and grime. Acid-based cleansers help chip away at the paste-like mixture of sebum and skin in acne-prone complexions. I rate Dr Dennis Gross Alpha Beta Cleansing Gel, £46, as it's a great cleanser if you suffer from recurrent blackheads. The alpha hydroxy acids dissolve the upper layer of dead skin cells, revealing brighter skin beneath.

Step Two: Pore Control

Next up: the pore-blasting step. During the Skinwork facial, cotton pads soaked in antibacterial yucca root are placed over the skin and gently warmed with a conical heat mask. This preps the skin for the 'extraction phase'. At home, I like to use Jinmee Hydrapuff Sheets, £6.50, as they’re more absorbent than cotton pads and are also biodegradable. Drench a couple of sheets in your favourite spot-clearing serum — I like to use the Haeckels Zinc + Fucoidan Overnight Spot & Acne Treatment, £21 — before draping them over your face. Then, create your own 'self-heating' mask. I do this with a combination of a dressing gown hood and some carefully wrapped warm flannels placed over these sheets. It’s not glamorous, but it works. Sit back and relax for 5-10 minutes and let the warmth of the flannels gently soften and loosen what's inside your pores.

Step Three: The Extractions

Before you get carried away, it's important to know that at-home extractions are always a bit of a risky game, and many dermatologists will tell you not to attempt it. You could cause more damage by pressing inflammation deeper into the skin, exacerbating the blackhead and even causing scarring. But let’s be honest, we all pop our spots from time to time, so if you are going to let loose, my advice for this next step is just to try and limit how far you go. Your pores should be softer and easier to squeeze thanks to the warmth from the damp flannel, so make sure your hands are clean and wrap your index fingers in a little bit of tissue, then very gently press any visibly blocked pores. Don’t go in too hard and if the blemish doesn’t budge after one or two attempts, then leave it — you could do more harm than good by carrying on. In fact, you might be dealing with a sebaceous filament, which sometimes get mistaken for blackheads. Here's how to tell the difference.

Step Four: Vitamin C

Vitamin C is a great ingredient. Not only does it give your skin that just-been-to-the-derm glow with use over time, but it helps to stimulate collagen, fade hyperpigmentation and protect against environmental aggressors like pollution, thanks to its antioxidant properties. Ideally you want quite a potent vitamin C product for this, but the beauty of at-home facials is that you can use whatever you have. I love Skinceuticals C E Ferulic, £135, but if that's out of your beauty budget, La Roche-Posay’s Pure Vitamin C10, £38, is a great, more affordable option, which doesn't tend to clog pores further, or The Ordinary Vitamin C Suspension 23% + HA Spheres 2%, £4.90. Pat or swipe your vitamin C serum over your face with clean fingers or use another Jinmee sheet and let it sink in for a couple of minutes before moving on to the next step.

Step Five: Moisturise

Dermatologists argue that even oily skin prone to blackheads needs moisture, so once your skin has drunk up your vitamin C serum, it’s time to lock everything in with a moisturiser. I like to use quite a lightweight product, and if you regularly get blackheads or other spots, it pays to avoid overly thick textures. Choose something non-comedogenic, like La Roche-Posay Toleriane Ultra Fluide, £16, which is less likely to block your pores further. One or two pumps gives my skin enough slip for me to really use my knuckles to break up any tension in my jaw and temples. It's also a good idea to give yourself a good facial massage. Using my hands, I employ sweeping motions to help aid lymphatic drainage and to reduce any puffiness. If you’ve got a gua sha tool or jade roller, then now is the time to really get in there and massage away any tension.

The Result

Sure, the at-home version might not be as fancy as the Skinwork Signature Facial, but it has become my go-to for whenever my skin is looking a bit congested and dull. While you can use all these ingredients and products as part of a daily skincare routine (and do most of it while watching Netflix, which is always a winner), be realistic. You might want to do the massage and use the warm flannels once a week in the evening, for example. You might also want to step up your evening routine with a retinol product, which dermatologists tout as a great ingredient for tackling blackheads. And if your blackheads aren't letting up and it's getting you down, perhaps consider visiting a qualified dermatologist (always check if they are on the General Medical Council register) for further advice.

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For some, a lipstick is just a lipstick. But for others, it's a source of strength, creativity, and expression. In our series Power Faces, we'll explore the relationship between strong women and the makeup they choose to wear — or not. Our latest subject is child actor turned Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter Tayla Parx, who released her first album, We Need to Talk , in April, and has co-written hits for Ariana Grande and Mariah Carey. This story was told to Samantha Sasso and edited for length and clarity.

I started getting my makeup done on TV and movie sets when I was 12 or 13 years old. Being put in front of the eyes of a lot of people at that age became one of those moments when I had to find my confidence. It’ll change as you grow up, and you’ll find and discover certain things about yourself that you love. You’ll also find something about yourself that isn’t your favourite thing, but that’s the thing that makes you special.

There are always these unspoken pressures and expectations, but this is the time, right now, when women are more empowered than ever to be exactly who they are. I’m honoured to be a part of this movement of independent women who are showing our take on feminism, our take on what a strong woman is through our style, our words, and how we project ourselves on the stage. It all goes back to being confident in your personal identity.

Pink Power

I've identified as a tomboy my entire life. I wasn’t really into makeup or the typical “girly” things, so I have a different idea of what feminism is, because I had to discover my own version of it along the way. I'm just now starting to love playing with makeup and finding these other sides to myself. You have to dig a little deeper and recognise what the norm is, and know that you might not be that. What if I woke up one day and loved different styles that I never could’ve imagined wearing because I was so stuck on this identity of being a tomboy?

I love the colour pink. I’m happy that I identify so much with that colour right now because it’s versatile; it never gets boring. There are so many different things it can stand for — right now, for me, it represents feminism. It’s ever-evolving, just the same as I am.

When I was younger, I looked to so many artists for inspiration. Missy Elliott was one of those women who turned traditional concepts on their head. I’d never seen someone like her before. Until recently, there wasn't a lot of representation of black women in beauty. All of a sudden, we have a really good opportunity to put these incredible black women on platforms to look at and conceptualise ideas of beauty that I didn’t have when I was younger. It's something I can incorporate into my everyday fashion, my everyday lifestyle — without having to be put into a box.

Crowning Glory

I’m a very moody person. My outfits depend on my mood, and my hair colour is based off of my outfits, so it all goes back to where I am in my life at the moment. I went through this lion phase for three years when I had long hair. My hair holds so much power for me — especially at that time, when it was like my comfort blanket. Then, when I started discovering who I was as a musician and a writer, I woke up one day and thought, Okay, this is my sound, but what does that sound look like?

Before recently, I'd never worn wigs — now, they’re how some people identify me. People had been used to seeing me with long hair, so it took them a minute to get used to my new look. That fact that I can effortlessly switch my look with a wig is freeing. Wigs are also a way I can take care of my natural hair. I have 14 wigs — it's getting crazy.

The bob is almost always around, but I’ve been kind of ready for a change. Maybe I will go into a natural phase one of these days. I just want to take care of my hair and see what the vibe is moving forward.

Business Of Glitter

I never want to feel like anything in my life, including my makeup, isn’t me. I wear things that I’m comfortable and confident in, and that’s the same approach I want to take with my makeup. When I perform, I need my glitter and lashes. When you see me with glitter, that means I woke up that day to play no games. Sometimes there’s glitter all over my shit, but I love it.

To go out without any makeup at all and still feel confident is powerful for me, too. It’s important to continue to keep that sense of grounding. Every makeup artist used to cover up my freckles. Then people were shocked when I wouldn’t wear makeup. Now, I make a point to tell makeup artists that I want my freckles to show. I want that real part of me to be present.

I’ve been uncomfortable without makeup before; I'm human. On those days when you think twice about it — when you feel like you should’ve put on some concealer or not worn your natural hair — you have to ask yourself why you’re feeling that way. It’s extremely important to get to the root of why you take a second look in the mirror before you walk out of the house.

When my fans see me strip down without the makeup, it’s another way for us to relate and connect to each other. It’s like when I’m on stage and I see people relate to my lyrics that come 100% from my heart. It’s a different way of connecting. I’m saying that I hear you, I’m here for you, I’m here with you. Seeing their reaction adds fuel to my fire. But in the same way that that’s real for me, so is adding a little spice in there, too, like a cool eyelid or bushy brows. It's all genuinely me.

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While the bathroom cabinet is home to most of our favourite skin-care products, there's another household space that's also proven to be valuable to our beauty routines: the kitchen. Ubiquitous ingredients like honey, milk, and sugar have been used as DIY beauty solutions for thousands of years, and continue to inspire new trends and innovations, too.

Apple cider vinegar is one such pantry staple. Made from fermented apple juice, the acidic liquid can be traced back to Babylonia and ancient Egypt, where it was said to have been used by Cleopatra as a facial cleanser. If legend is to be believed, Hippocrates prescribed apple cider vinegar to treat infections; American Civil War soldiers supposedly used it in wounds to encourage healing.

Today, we can find apple cider vinegar — or ACV, as it's called for short — in not just salad dressings and "health tonics," but also DIY recipes embracing the ingredient the way Cleopatra did: as a skin-care treatment for a clear, balanced, acne-free complexion. "Apple cider vinegar has been used by many to treat a number of conditions," says board-certified dermatologist Lian A. Mack, MD. Anecdotally, "numerous websites and blogs attest to the efficacy of it in improving acne and discolouration."

Apple Cider Vinegar For Acne

So, what is it about ACV that has some people reaching for it as a blemish treatment in the first place? "Apple cider vinegar is rich in malic acid, which is similar to alpha-hydroxy acid and has an exfoliating effect on the skin,” says Dr. Mack. This exfoliating effect promotes cell turnover, which sloughs away dead skin cells and helps clear out and prevent clogged pores (and therefore acne, too). That clarifying function, paired with the fact that it reduces melanin production in the skin, works to even out the overall complexion.

But as appealing as ACV might sound, the potency of the product carries its own risks — especially if you have sensitive skin.

Apple Cider Vinegar Side Effects

Just like too much ACV in a dressing can ruin a salad, because of the high acidity, overdoing the stuff in your beauty routine can damage your skin. “Apple cider vinegar, although a natural ingredient, can do serious harm if used in excess," says Dr. Mack. "It lowers the pH of the skin, which can ultimately cause a chemical burn."

Jill Fichtel, MD, of Transformative Dermatology says that the best way to avoid an ACV-induced skin freakout is to always dilute the solution with water. Dr. Fichtel recommends following a recipe according to your skin type as follows: 1 part water with 1 part ACV for those with oily skin, 2 parts water with 1 part ACV for normal skin, and 3 parts water with 1 part ACV for those with relatively sensitive skin.

With that said, Dr. Fichtel and Dr. Mack both stress that those with extremely sensitive skin will do better avoiding ACV altogether. “I would not recommend this for patients with sensitive or dry skin," Dr. Mack says. "Due to its acidic nature, malic acid is innately irritating. People who have very dry skin, eczema, or even facial redness or rosacea may experience flare-ups of their conditions and are more likely to develop a contact allergy."

Another important factor to take into consideration is how often you’re using the ACV solution on your face. Dr. Mack advises doing so sparingly, as you would with many other potent chemical exfoliants: once or twice a week, depending on your skin type.

Apple Cider Vinegar Uses

As an alternative to using ACV as a leave-on treatment or toner, Dr. Mack recommends trying it as a cleanser instead. Swipe a thin layer of vinegar quickly over the face using a cotton pad — which allows for more control when applying — then rinse it off with warm water and smooth on moisturiser afterward. And don't forget sun protection: "Any product that increases cellular turnover should be coupled with an effective sunscreen like Jane Iredale's Powder-Me SPF Dry Sunscreen, which also soothes,” Dr. Mack says.

There's also the lowest-risk option of investing in store-bought skin-care products that contain ACV, or malic acid, as part of a stabilised, regulated formula. "When used in the right concentration, malic acid can be safely used to reduce the signs of ageing, acne, and pigmentation," Dr. Mack says.

So, before you reach for the two-litre jug in the condiment aisle, consider the fact that ACV's efficacy may be outweighed by the potential for skin damage. The high acidity isn't something you should mess around with, and at the end of the day, the ingredient's strength isn't always a good thing — whether you're drinking it, washing your hair with it, or putting it on your face to make like an Egyptian queen.

At Refinery29, we’re here to help you navigate this overwhelming world of stuff. All of our market picks are independently selected and curated by the editorial team. If you buy something we link to on our site, Refinery29 may earn commission.

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Between the sweeping romance of STARZ’s Outlander, the nerdy historical thrills of NBC’s Timeless(RIP), the “hold the door” drama of Game of Thrones , and the recent quantum realm leaps of Avengers: Endgame, time travel is having a moment.

See You Yesterday, newcomer Stefon Bristol’s debut Netflix film co-written by Fredrica Bailey and produced by mentor Spike Lee, falls within the conventions of the genre. (Don’t stay too long, don’t run into your past self, etc.) But even in a timeline that has lived through Thanos annihilating half the universe with a single snap of his fingers, there’s a social urgency to this particular story that feels unique.

Adapted from Bristol’s 2017 short film by the same name, See You Yesterday has obvious parallels to Back To The Future. Michael J. Fox even makes a cameo as a high school teacher — and in another fun wink, he’s reading Octavia E. Butler’s Kindred. But while it may follow Marty McFly’s funny antics in form, its heady emotional arc is a lot closer to Butler’s seminal black time-travel novel, which follows a black woman going back in time to the Antebellum South.

CJ (Eden Duncan Smith) and Sebastian (Dante Crichlow) are brilliant teens hell-bent on winning their high school’s science competition with a travel device prototype that they hope will get them out of East Flatbush and into the Ivy League. And to their surprise, it actually works.

At first, time travel just seems like a fun idea — jump back 24 hours, stay for 10 minutes, get back at your rude ex by throwing a Slushee at him, and be back in time for dinner. The film does a great job of conveying their thrilled exhilaration upon realising the scope of their scientific breakthrough, and it’s heartwarming. Moreover, seeing two black teens, one of them a woman, taking time — with all the history of oppression and injustice that it symbolises — into their own hands, feels revolutionary on its own.

But the stakes escalate drastically when CJ’s brother Calvin (Astro) is shot and killed by the police in a case of mistaken identity. Distraught over her loss, she convinces Sebastian to use their time travel creation to save Calvin from his terrible fate.

Jimena Azula’s colourful, buzzing production design gives us a time machine that feels like a cross between Ghostbusters and Spy Kids, in sharp contrast with the seriousness of its intended purpose. The result is a teen adventure film with adult emotional concerns echoing the fact that too many marginalised teens across the country have been faced with similar life-and-death situations.

Duncan Smith and Crichlow are compelling performers with charming chemistry, and the script allows them to flourish beyond stereotype. Their characters contain multitudes — they’re Black, they’re from Brooklyn (Lee’s influence is apparent in the lush, loving way the neighbourhood is portrayed), they’re insanely smart, they’re brash, they’re impulsive, they’re fiercely loyal, they’re nerdy, they’re stylish, and did I mention SMART? They invented time travel in their sophomore year of high school.

Still, as in all time travel films, the plot starts to unravel if you think too much about it. Bristol deals with some of the issues by imposing specific constraints: CJ and Sebastian’s device only allows them to go back a week at the very most, and their time/space continuum wormhole closes after 10 minutes. This gives the characters a deadline (technically, CJ and Sebastian only have a finite window of time to save Calvin — once they get past the one week mark, they won’t have enough power to return to that moment in time), but the ticking clock comes off as artificial, mainly because many of the setbacks they face seem like they could easily be solved with small tweaks, like jumping back from a different location, or approaching a conversation just a tad more diplomatically.

As CJ and Sebastian go back over and over again to fix their mounting mistakes, the action starts to feel a little more Looper than Back to the Future. We see similar scenes play out slightly differently, pushed this way or that by the smallest variation in detail.

Undeniable, however, is the powerful impact of watching a cycle of violence that cannot be broken, no matter how many ways it plays out.

See You Yesterday is available on Netflix now

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There’s an ongoing struggle for women in music to be heard. The National didn’t set out, when writing their ninth LP, I Am Easy to Find, to become their allies— but after partnering with director Mike Mills ( 20th Century Women) on a film to accompany the album, it became apparent that this project needed women’s voices.

The addition of vocals from amazing women, including Sharon van Etten, Lisa Hannigan, Gail Ann Dorsey, Mina Tindle, Kate Stables, Eve Owen, and the Brooklyn Youth Chorus, elevate and broaden songs that could have been typically male-centred takes. The sound of women makes the National’s music, entrenched in a specific aesthetic over nearly two decades, into something fresh.

The gender-neutral sounds of Dorsey, long a member of David Bowie’s band, on “You Had Your Soul with You” brings clarity and poignancy to a song that might otherwise come across as terse. With Tindle’s contribution to “Oblivious,” a separation becomes a conversation between a man and a woman, tied to a sense of melancholy about the distance between the two — and the layered harmonizing of her softer, higher voice with singer Matt Berninger’s baritone voice is a revelation. “The Pull of You” starts with van Etten shifts into a literal conversation with masculine and feminine spoken word sections from van Etten, Berninger, and Hannigan.

It’s not difficult to integrate the voices of multiple women and points of view into the National’s template, and that may be in part due to the collaborators the band works with regularly, including Berninger’s wife, Carin, who’s co-written songs since 2007’s Boxer.

What makes the project truly feminist is the film that neither accompanies nor uses all of the music by Mills — it is a sister project pulling snippets from the album and its theme. Starring Alicia Vikander, it tells the story of a life from one woman’s vantage point. Vikander is born, grows up, and experiences things that many women will: she gets an abortion during college, experiences her first kiss with a girl, cheats on her husband with both sexes and more. In other words, she’s a complex, multidimensional human being.

The album’s title track serves as the jumping off point for the film, depicting a layered relationship in which a couple has drifted apart, but at the end of the day would say, “I’m still waiting for you every night with ticker tape.” While not an overt statement of allyship, it’s an unexpected acknowledgment of the feminine point of view for a band so strongly associated with the masculine.

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Have you ever been trying to fall asleep and thought to yourself: If I go to bed now, I’ll get five hours and 32 minutes of sleep. If so, you’ve officially self-sabotaged your own “good night’s rest.” That’s according to Dr. Susan Biali Haas, M.D. an expert on stress management and resilience. “Don’t go down that road,” Biali Haas says. “This can produce anxiety, and you should be thinking instead about anything that will relax you.”

What you think about when you fall asleep is an intimate, personal thing — and most of us do more than count sheep. I’ve spoken with people who pray, listen to meditation podcasts, fantasise about the future, and repeat the lyrics of their favourite song. Everyone does their own thing — but what’s the right thing?

Clinical psychologist and sleep specialist Michael Breus, Ph.D., also known as the Sleep Doctor, says the happier your thoughts before bed, the better. “Thoughts before sleep usually turn into dreams, so I’m often asking my patients to think about more positive things right before bed,” Breus says. “One of my favourite pastimes is to have people write a gratitude list. This is usually very positive, and helpful.”

Psychiatrist Neel Burton, M.D. agrees that thinking about what you're grateful for can be helpful as you drift off. “I just focus on whatever crosses my mind, even if it’s only sleeping in a warm bed!” Burton tells Refinery29 via email. “Gratitude leads to feelings of perspective, calm, and relaxation, which are conducive to sleep.” Burton previously wrote about gratitude and sleep for Psychology Today, and noted that studies have linked gratitude with better sleep, health, and reduced stress.

Biali Haas says sometimes the best thing to think about is nothing specific at all. “I do think it’s important to avoid actual thinking,” she says. “Don’t focus on anything that’s going to stimulate or wake up the brain.” Although some recommend thinking about positive things as you fall asleep, you may want to avoid that if you’re a person who’s easily excitable. Thinking about your crush or the dazzling shoes you’ll wear out on the town this weekend is fun, but it might keep you awake. If this is the case, Biali Haas says you might want to focus on your breath, repeat a phrase or mantra in your mind, or meditate. “Focus on something neutral,” Biali Haas says.

She also notes there are things you shouldn't think about. Thinking about work, or listing off things that need to get done tomorrow is a bad habit that can keep your mind racing. Biali Haas also notes that the brain has a tendency to "catastrophise" at night. We imagine that things are worse than they are — whether it has to do with your relationship or a work problem. “At night when the lights are out, a lot of people tend to blow things out of proportion,” Biali Haas says. “Darkness is conducive to this… It’s an interesting phenomenon, and that’s why panic attacks often happen at night.”

If you can’t stop yourself from thinking about the worst that could happen, Biali Haas recommends getting out of bed and journaling about what’s troubling you. Then getting back in bed and trying again. This time, try for neutral or pleasant thoughts.

All this is to say that thinking about “counting sheep” as you fall asleep is an antiquated concept. If you must count, try this trick from Dr. Breus.

“Counting works best when it is mathematically complicated and boring,” Breus notes. “So I recommend counting backwards from 300 by threes. Try it, it works.”

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Just because you want to be responsible when it comes to your interior style, doesn't mean that, all of a sudden, you have to sacrifice your living room to hemp woven rugs and dumpster sofas.

In fact, there's a whole bunch of super stylish brands who are committed to behaving responsibly. Whether that means that their products are made in the UK by independent artisans whose crafts have been put at risk from mass production, or that they source products from international initiatives in developing countries which commit to paying their workers good wages with benefits. Perhaps they even take old stuff, destined to be ditched as waste, and turn it into something new.

Read on to find our favourite responsible online homeware stores.

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Kim Kardashian has blessed your weekend by finally revealing a picture and the name of her fourth baby, and I literally mean "blessed." The mother revealed on Instagram that her new baby boy is named Psalm West, which is the most Kanye thing I've ever heard.

Mostly because Kanye West's recent thing has been conducting musical Sunday Services, which aren't church services but aren't not church services, since they are technically Christian. Plus, there's his whole Yeezus schtick. Essentially, Psalm West is absolutely going to be a single on a new album.

But "Psalm" has other meanings beyond just Kanye, of course. Traditionally, the word is used in reference to a hymn or song in both Christian and Jewish religions. There's also the "Book of Psalms," which is a section in the Bible.

And if you want to get really technical, "psalm" is a Middle English word from the Old English "psealm," the Latin "psalmus," and the Greek "psalmos" which literally means "twanging of a harp."

Kim shared the baby name alongside a text from Kanye himself, which includes a picture of the bundled up baby and Mother's Day wishes: "Beautiful Mother's Day, With the arrival of our fourth child We are blessed beyond measure We have everything we need."

View this post on Instagram

‪Psalm West ‬

A post shared by Kim Kardashian West (@kimkardashian) on May 17, 2019 at 3:07pm PDT

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It's time to book a pedicure and say hello to weird tan-lines: toe-loop sandals are back. Along with tiny shoulder bags, grunge-inspired piercings and skate culture, the strappy style is part of a larger '90s style renaissance.

The toe-loop got a major revamp on the SS19 catwalks, thanks to Celine, Y/Project, Phillip Lim and Tibi. This season, toe-loop sandals are bold and minimalistic, not to mention versatile, comfortable and easy to walk in – perfect for hopping on and off a packed Tube in the summer.

Daintier than other SS19 shoe trends (think chunky hiking-style sandals), heeled strappy toe-loops are ideal for summer date nights and pairing with dressier outfits. Add lace-up straps à la Celine to your favourite sundress for subtle sexiness. As flats, they're the perfect grown-up flip-flop alternative.

Indie brands LOQ and ATP Atelier are leading the pack when it comes to designer brands. Our favourites on the high street include Topshop – which has a number of toe-loop designs, including vegan styles – and ASOS.

From everyday styles to holiday night out heels, click on for the toe-loop sandals that will become your new summer staples.

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Chika Oranika wasn't afraid to strip down to her skivvies to appear in the latest round of Calvin Klein's #MyCalvins ad campaign. The 22-year-old rapper is no stranger to the internet; She went viral last autumn for criticising Kanye West 's endorsement of right wing commentator Candace Owens. The best part? She did it in a freestyle over his own "Jesus Walks" beat.

“I’ve never gotten a reception like that to any musical thing I’ve done, and I realised I was good at it,” she told TIME in April. “I just wanted to get better from that day forward. I genuinely began to feel like, ‘If this is something I want to do with my life, I want to be the best at it.’ So I kept just posting more videos, writing every single night for a year, just to brush up on the skills and that’s kind of how I fell into it.” Soon after, she landed her campaign with Calvin Klein, too.

“Chika’s lyrics instantly caught our attention. We loved that she built her own profile and we wanted to share her raw talent with the world. She wasn’t afraid to put her most authentic self out there and that made her a perfect fit for Calvin Klein – she’s real and unapologetic," Cedric Murac, EVP, Global Creative, Calvin Klein tells Refinery29 via email.

Below Chika chats with Refinery about representation, preparing for her campaign, and rising above online backlash.

Refinery29: How did you react when Calvin Klein reached out about the campaign?

Chika: I was shocked because I had no idea they knew who I was since I didn’t have a song out yet. It was a happy surprise.

How did you prepare for the shoot? Did you give yourself a pep talk?

It didn’t require a pep talk, but I did clear my mind that morning thinking about what I was doing, who it was going to help, and why I was doing it — in case any last minute nerves did pop up.

Your campaign has received a lot of vitriol online just for being body positive. What do you say to the naysayers?

They picked the wrong one to root against. I think the naysayers are a group of people who like to lose bets.

Do you think your campaign was an important step for the fashion industry?

Yes, because I think it opens up the floor for a conversation and dialogue regarding media representation and diversity. Bodies of different shapes and sizes shouldn’t be censored or hidden. In order to be the change that we want to see, we need to put our best foot forward. This was a great move for Calvin Klein and the industry as a whole.

How loud did you scream when you saw your billboard? What was the first thought you had when you saw it?

I haven’t seen it in person yet but I did wake up to a text from someone in the city sending me a photo of it. It was a very proud moment if I do say so myself.

Interview has been edited and condensed for clarity and length.

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If you’re all caught up on Queer Eye and missing the brilliant fashion wisdom from the Fab Five’s Tan France, today is your lucky day. Netflix just announced that the designer and TV personality is slated to host a brand new competition series called Next In Fashion. His co-host will be none other than Alexa Chung, a fellow Brit and one of fashion’s OG it girls. The show is being described as “high-stakes,” and for a good reason: The winner will receive a $250,000 (£196,000) prize and an opportunity to debut their collection with luxury fashion retailer Net-a-Porter.

Similar to Project Runway, Netflix’s Next In Fashion will start off with a pool of designers who will come face-to-face with all sorts of design challenges. According to a press release from Netflix, the contestants will have to work with “a different trend or design style that has influenced the way the entire world dresses.” So, y’know, no pressure or anything.

Elizabeth Stewart, stylist and fashion editor, and Eva Chen, Instagram’s director of fashion partnerships, have been confirmed as recurring guest judges. And the first round of contestants are actually vets; the show features people who have been in the industry for a while, either working for major brands or dressing celebrities.

The streaming giant has ordered 10 episodes for the series’ first season, which doesn’t have a premiere date just yet. In the meantime, should we start taking bets on how many times we’ll hear the phrase “French tuck”?

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Ever since my first job at MTV working as a music programmer, I can't stop trying to match people with music they might like. So, I wrote a book calledRecord Collecting for Girls and started interviewing musicians. The Music Concierge is a column where I share music I'm listening to that you might enjoy, with a little context. Get everything I've recommended this year on Spotify, follow me on Twitter or Facebook, and leave a comment below telling me what you're listening to this week.

Dana Williams "Holiday"

Oh were you looking for a nice smooth, slow summer jam to kick off your Summer 2019 Vibes playlist? Found it for you. Williams has one of those jazz-influenced voices (for real, you heard it in Whiplash) that is just so easy to listen to. Paired with a drum-forward (another nod to jazz) production touched up with modern flourishes, this is the hazy days of summer track I'll be bumping until about October.

Lauran Hibberd "Hoochie"

All the stuff you loved about Weezer on those first two albums (the only good ones, don't @ me) is exactly what's lovable about Hibberd: the crunchy sound with quirky guitar parts, the hilarious and dryly delivered lyrics, the IRONY. Hibberd knows hoochie means slut in '90s speak...and that's why she named her hamster, as well as this song, that. A closer listen reveals that the hoochie in question is more of a douchebag who made the poor life choice of not picking Hibberd. Rude.

Grace Gillespie "I'm Your Man"

One of the best things about Gillespie's track is the musical build up to the chorus. It's an homage to how Phil Spector treated his famous songs — the ones that still get stuck in your head for days — but also loaded down with a fuzzy guitar straight out of the Jesus & Mary Chain. Add that to the Leonard Cohen reference with the song title and dear god there's a lot of stuff I like about this track. But the best part is Gillespie's unique, etherial voice. Baby, she's the kind of girl I've been looking for.

Jozzy "Sucka Free"

So, you know how you got obsessed with "Old Town Road "? Part of the thanks goes to Jozzy, who wrote the Billy Ray Cyrus verse on the remix. For a song about being real, Jozzy keeps it upbeat — she loves her bop bop bops and doesn't advocate for chasing likes (easy to say when you've got Lil' Wayne on the track). It's fun, it's light, it's got that special something that will make it sound good on repeat.

V.V. Lightbody "Baby, Honestly"

The phrasing on V.V. Lightbody's vocals in this track were what stuck me on first listen — the way she holds a bit on "baby" and the music stops, drawing the moment out with her. And then there's the step up at the end of the chorus, so unexpected! While the track is built on the floor of a bossa nova beat, it's got the vibe of a The Bird and the Bee song, with those honey-dripping vocals and the lounge-y music. Just ride this wave through spring.

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Ahead of her wedding this June, 26-year-old Tirzah Gestetner has done all the things expected of a modern bride-to-be. She has decided on a location: Thailand, which is close to her native Australia, where her family still lives. She has picked out her flower arrangements. She has finalised her set dinner menus, and, of course, she's got the perfect dress. But now, one month from the big day, she has one final — and rather momentous — decision to make: her wig.

Within Gestetner's own Orthodox Jewish family, the tradition has been that after a woman gets married, she will cover her hair. Many Orthodox women do this with scarves, but others, like Gestetner, have grown up seeing the matriarchs in their family wear sheitels, which is the Yiddish term for a wig worn by a married Orthodox Jewish woman. "I used to try my mom’s wigs on, and it was like, Oh my god, I’m gonna look like this when I get married," Gestetner says. "Currently, it’s gone from excitement to like, Oh, now I have to cover my hair. Well, now I don't know if I want to do that. I love my hair!"

To find a sheitel that fits her personal style, which she will start wearing the day after her wedding, Gestetner drove five minutes from her home in Crown Heights, Brooklyn to Zelda Hair, a bright wig shop with more than 20,000 followers on Instagram. According to its owner, 28-year-old Zelda Volkov, it sells approximately 600 wigs a year, with more than half of its customers looking for wigs for religious reasons.

When we visited the shop on a foggy Friday in late March, it was clear that Zelda Hair is popular for a few reasons. First, it caters to a younger audience; the shop posts on Instagram several times a day, and often tags the Insta-famous women who frequent its location. Gestetner knew the shop because her two sisters, who run the popular modest fashion brand The Frock, also get their wigs there. With prices ranging between $2,200 to $5,500, the wigs are a far cry from the more common dark bobs often associated with sheitels. Volkov crafts styles that range from multicoloured mermaid waves to trendy tousled brunette lobs, which Volkov says are the best-selling units at the moment.

Zelda Hair's popularity among young Orthodox Jewish women, who fly across the country and sometimes even the world to shop there, makes it the centre of a conversation currently being had in Orthodox Judaism: To wig or not to wig? While it was once seen as more of a rule or a community standard than a choice, these young women are exploring their options when it comes to covering their hair, effectively creating their own unique relationships with these wigs and how they decide to wear them.

As with many aspects of Judaism, there is debate over what a sheitel really represents — and who it is really for. "One of the conversations within Jewish law has declared a woman’s hair to be nakedness and part of the alluring nature of the effeminate," Rabbi Avram Mlotek, a Modern Orthodox-ordained rabbi who teaches in Manhattan, says. Indeed, in the Jewish religious law text the Talmud, it is declared that "hair on a woman is ervah, " or essentially, "nakedness and impropriety" that should be covered once a woman is married.

The tradition of married Orthodox Jewish women covering their hair has been around for thousands of years, with women first using a cloth or a veil. It wasn't until the 16th century that Jewish women in Italy popularised the idea of wearing a wig as a covering, which actually ended up causing a huge debate among rabbis, who both condemned and condoned the practice of wearing them on modesty grounds.

But today, even as the debate over wigs remains unsettled across Orthodox communities (the fastest-growing denomination within Judaism), sheitels are reportedly more popular than ever. Why? Rabba Melissa Scholten-Gutierrez, an Orthodox rabbi who teaches in Atlanta and always covers her hair with a hat or wig, says many communities are looking to modernise. "The Modern Orthodox community values the blending of a deep commitment to Jewish life and being integrated into society," says Rabba Melissa, adding that wig options have vastly improved in the last few years. "The wigs allow someone to take part in the mitzvah of covering and still feel like they’re not losing their identity."

But there's another reason why some Jewish women are looking to wigs rather than caps and scarfs. With anti-Semitism in America on the rise and anti-Semitic assaults up a staggering 105% since 2017, Rabba Melissa says she's had conversations with women who see wigs as a safer option. "People are afraid of talking about their fears, but I have had a few conversations with women who have expressed how they can pass under the radar more with a wig than those who wear other head coverings," she says.

Wigs allow someone to take part in the mitzvah of covering and still feel like they’re not losing their identity.

While every Orthodox community's expectations around sheitels are different— as is every woman's relationship to these wigs — there remains a prevailing question: Can you believe in your own agency as a woman, consider yourself a feminist, and cover your hair? Today, some women argue that yes, you absolutely can. For them, it is a choice that they make for themselves and their faith, rather than something that feels like an order. It can also have little to do with their husbands at all.

Cover Story

Zelda Hair was actually born out of Volkov's uneasy feelings about having to wear a wig in the first place. "At 19, I got married, and I had a really bad relationship with my wig," Volkov, who no longer wears wigs because she is divorced, says. "I felt so pressured, and I ended up with a short black bob. I went from looking 15 to 45 overnight."

For the first three years of her marriage, Volkov looked at that wig as a burden, and finally took it upon herself at 22 to start crafting wigs of her own that more closely resembled her own long, wavy, blonde hair. In 2016, she opened Zelda Hair as an alternative to the stereotypically dark and outdated wig shops in her neighbourhood, where there is a lively Orthodox Jewish community. The reaction was electric, drawing a diverse clientele who were looking for not just a stylish, natural-looking wig, but sometimes also an Instagram-ready statement piece. Among them was Shira Shenberger, who chose to dye her sheitel sky blue.

"I got married and I was doing what I thought was the right thing to do," Shenberger, 29, says of her early years wearing a sheitel. "It wasn't a choice or a question. Whereas today, it's very much a choice that I make and something that I actively want to do."

Shenberger's sheitel is now an on-trend rainbow look, with blue and purple dyes swirling into yellow tips. "For me, my wig represents total love," Shenberger says. "I think that it’s very different from other people, because they have brown or blonde hair, and when they want to leave their house, they’ll put another layer of brown or blonde on top of it. For me, when I decide to wear it, it’s a full transformation."

Shenberger doesn't always wear her wig. She dons caps and scarves and even a hoodie in colder weather and feels just fine. For Adina Sash, a 30-year-old Orthodox Jewish activist who recently ran for City Council in Flatbush, Brooklyn, it’s a similar story. Some mornings, she feels like wearing a wig, which she bought at Zelda to match her naturally thick, brown hair. Other days, not so much.

"There’s so much more chargedness with the decision," Sash says. "It comes with thinking about community, expectation, female roles as a mother, female roles as a free, uninhibited female. It’s such a hard decision to make. My relationship with my wigs is very fluid. It’s constantly changing."

When Sash got married at 18, she shocked her family by initially being firmly anti-wig. "I come from a line of women who strictly cover their hair," Sash says. "And I told my parents, 'I’m not doing it. It feels like it’s squashing my identity. And they were like, 'What did we do wrong?' And I was like, 'No, what did you do right?'"

As the years have passed, Sash has come to wear wigs more frequently, most recently to connect better with voters who are from Orthodox communities. "It’s not just about myself, but also about the women I represent when I speak publicly," she says. "I feel like I owe it to them and I owe it to my tribe. If I want to represent the female Orthodox population, I feel like it’s respectful to wear a wig.”

But while women like Shenberger and Sash are exercising their choices around covering their hair when they see fit, other young women are trying to stay committed to covering at all times.

Take Olivia Garcia, a 24-year-old newlywed from Baltimore who entered the shop looking to get the cap in her wig sized down. Garcia is actually the first woman in her immediate family to wear wigs, telling us that she only came to learn about Judaism “beyond bagels and lox” in college, where she became more observant. At first, Garcia admits, “the wigs were something that I really freaked out about.”

It wasn’t until last year, after Garcia got engaged and found Zelda Hair on Instagram, that she became convinced that a wig could actually work for her. “I was really happy here because they make you feel good,” says Garcia, who now covers her hair every single day. “As I grew more observant, I realised I wanted a husband who wanted me to cover my hair, and I really wanted to as well. I struggled with, Am I just conforming to these norms? Or am I really doing this for me? I came to the realisation that it was both of those things, and it was OK because that’s the religious path that I’ve chosen.”

Although sheitels are associated with married women, there are unmarried women who wear them as well. Rochel Cohen, a 35-year-old mother of two who's the head of sales at Zelda Hair, takes wearing wigs seriously despite being divorced for eight years now. Her reasons for doing so stem from the fact that she dislikes her natural hair texture, and because of community expectations.

"The Chabad rabbis in our community do not give permission for a woman to take off their hair covering if they have children," says Cohen, who notes that other rabbis in other communities do give permission. "In the community here, all the women cover their hair, and it may embarrass their children if their mom is walking around without a head covering. I very much value that. We have very religious schools here. I don't want my kids to feel any different."

Tradition, Tradition

For most, tradition also fuels the decision. "My mother covered her hair, and her mother covered her hair, and her mother covered her hair," says Shaina Wiess, a 39-year-old mother of four who flew in from Los Angeles to re-style her wig. "Who am I to take something that was so special to my great-grandmother, my grandmother, and my mother, and break that beautiful tradition when it was something that was given to me?"

Despite feeling that way now, Wiess was close to ditching wigs entirely after 20 years of wearing them. In her words, they just made her feel unlike herself, and she had a hard time finding a wig that matched her naturally strawberry-blonde hair. Wigs also caused Wiess anxiety because she was the only Orthodox woman at her catering job, and she didn’t want her coworkers at the time to know she was wearing one.

Zelda Hair solved that problem for her, creating a wig that matches the colour and texture of her hair exactly. "Without it, I feel naked," Wiess says. "It symbolises that I'm married. It symbolises where I come from, where I am, and where I'm going. It’s so much more than just a thing that sits on my head. It’s a tradition I want to give to my children so they can also wear it with pride."

While Wiess has had two decades to ruminate on what her wig means to her, 26-year-old Gestetner is just getting started. To ease her way into this tradition, Gestetner has chosen to go with what's called a "fall," which will sit on the top of her head to cover the crown while allowing her chestnut-brown hair to be nearly completely visible underneath.

"I’m moving away from what my hair means to me now and what showing my hair to the world means," Gestetner says. "When I get married, I don't know how it’s going to feel every day. Maybe I'll want to put a scarf or a cap on sometimes. I’m gonna figure that out as I start wearing it."

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British athlete Jo Pavey has said that her sponsorship deal from a leading global sportswear brand was "paused" when she became pregnant.

Pavey, who won the gold medal in the 10,000 metres at the 2014 European Championships, said that she felt "punished" by Nike for deciding to start a family. She said her sponsorship was halted first when she became pregnant with son Jacob, and then again with daughter Emily.

"When I announced I was pregnant my contract was immediately paused," Devon-born Pavey told Sky News. "One of the main problems is the target to get the contract back and the timescale. It was the joy of running that kept me going because you think 'what will, be will be' and I was focused on being a mum. But you don't want to feel punished for being pregnant."

Three American athletes, Alysia Montano, Phoebe Wright and Kara Goucher, revealed similar experiences with the brand earlier this week. "Getting pregnant is the kiss of death for a female athlete,” Wright, a runner sponsored by Nike for six years, told the New York Times. “There’s no way I’d tell Nike if I were pregnant.”

Pavey is the first British athlete to add her voice to the controversy.

Nike, which celebrated Serena Williams' Grand Slam-winning tennis success after starting a family in its Dream Crazier marketing campaign, has insisted that it recently altered its policy towards female athletes who become pregnant.

"Nike is proud to sponsor thousands of female athletes. As is common practice, our agreements do include contractual performance obligations," the spokesperson said.

"Historically, a few female athletes had reduced payments based on failure to meet their contractual performance obligations. We recognised that there was a need for more consistency in our approach and in 2018 we standardised our approach across all sports so that no female athlete is penalised financially for pregnancy."

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You hopefully knew this already, but Refinery29 plays very well with others. Case in point: For this week’s UnStyled podcast, global editor-in-chief and co-founder Christene Barberich interviewed Stella Bugbee, the editor-in-chief and president of another popular women’s outlet, The Cut. Having both survived the radical, sometimes scary evolution of media, Christene and Stella had much to discuss.

When you’re at the helm of a major multi-pronged website, traffic, digital revenue, social media and the demise of countless former institutions are the daily de rigeur. To face all of this effectively, Stella offers one takeaway, one she calls “corny” and “like a 90s anthem”: “The big lesson for me is embrace the chaos.” This isn’t just a philosophy for mental health, she says. “Control, which is a thing that many people seek in every industry, isn't necessarily the best way to grow, and growth is the goal for most of us,” she observes. “So the challenge is, how do you balance growth and quality? Letting go of some need for controlling every single thing is the only way to do it... Chaos [is] the defining characteristic of working online.” [Ed. note: She’s right!]

And Stella, an alum of shuttered Conde Nast magazine Domino, is only looking forward. “I have no nostalgia for print,” she tells Christene. In fact, she asserts, “I don’t think that there's a future for magazines, print, paper, newspapers.” Lest you find that pessimistic, she clarifies: “That doesn’t mean there's not a future for storytelling, truth telling, and investigations. In fact, quite the opposite. I think it's more and more necessary to be rigorous about the processes behind journalism than it ever was. The medium in which those stories and those truths are distributed is just not going to be paper.”

Stella is also a married mom of three who has a work-life balance to figure out like the rest of us, but she’s a little skeptical about a few 2019 tropes about how to achieve that — especially the concept of self-care. “I always just chuckle — not even chuckle, I shake my head, like how do they do it? when people talk about self-care. Who the fuck has time to self-care?!”

Accordingly, her advice — to anyone, especially any woman — looking to balance their career and personal lives is...no advice. “I hate to give advice,” she says. “Because I think it is so hard to take, and so custom to every person. I would say my greatest gift in life is that I don’t compare myself to other people on a regular basis, and that helps me function.”

She continues: “I have an allergic reaction to hearing how other people live, and then thinking I should live like that. Occasionally I take lessons from people that say good things, but really...My life is mine. My decisions are weird and unique and they only suit me, and that's okay.”

To hear the rest of Stella’s honest, no-bullshit chat with Christene about motherhood, the state of media and more, listen to UnStyled and subscribe via Apple Podcasts.

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You spent four months trying to nail down a wedding venue that feels like home (before eventually settling on your own backyard), then three more on the hunt for a dress that makes you look like the best version of you. So it only makes sense that you would take a similarly personal approach to your makeup — and sometimes, that means keeping it as natural as possible.

Minimalist bridal makeup is much more than a trend set into motion by Meghan Markle last May: It's simple, it's classic, and it's the one thing that works for everyone. Ahead, all the inspiration you need to perfect the look (or show to your wedding-day makeup artist), so you can feel confident in looking like yourself — but better — on the big day.

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