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It’s Monday morning and I’m standing in the street, frantically texting my husband.

"I think our car’s been stolen," I type.

"Are you sure?" he replies.

After walking up and down a few times in agitation, I decide I am sure. I contact the police and file a report. An hour later I get a call.

"Is that Ms Cookney? Your car hasn’t been stolen, it’s in the car pound. Your parking permit expired two weeks ago."

I feel thoroughly idiotic but I have to admit I’m not surprised. I have a 14-month-old baby and I’m juggling a freelance writing career on top of being his primary carer. We have a childminder two days a week and my husband has one weekday off a fortnight to look after him. But even when I’m not actively on mum duty, I still do the bulk of the admin. When I’m not at my desk, I’m preparing food, cleaning up food, washing his clothes, wiping his grubby hands, restocking nappies and wipes, planning activities for him. After he goes to bed I just about have time to eat my own dinner, answer a few emails and possibly squeeze in an episode of Killing Eve before I crash into bed myself. Renewing the permit was the last thing on my mind.

The mere act of agreeing to do something used to be enough to log it in my memory. These days it takes a to-do list, a calendar entry, several alerts and a further reminder, and even then I’m not making any promises.

"Don’t worry," my cousin says when I tell her the story. "You’re a mum now so you can just blame it on baby brain!"

I used to hate it when people talked about "baby brain". How extremely condescending to imply that women with children are less capable, to hold up every mistake they make as evidence of their inferior mental aptitude. How sexist, I thought. Men don't have to put up with this shit. But I’m starting to think that maybe "baby brain" isn’t such a ridiculous concept after all.

Latest research suggests that pregnancy changes the structure of the brain and that these changes can last up to two years after the birth. Reproductive psychiatrist Alexandra Sacks MD assures me this isn’t as alarming as it sounds.

"There’s a misogynistic history of jokes that pregnancy makes you stupid. There is no evidence to suggest you’d be any less capable at your job or any less strong intellectually or cognitively," she says.

The memory lapses and feelings of disorganisation, however, are a genuine phenomenon. Studies have shown increased activity in areas of the brain related to emotional skills during pregnancy and diminished ability to recall words. Meanwhile research published earlier this year showed that pregnant women struggle more than non-pregnant women with tasks related to attention, decision-making, planning and memory, and that this lasts into early parenthood.

One theory is that memory is the trade-off for the augmented emotional skills.

But the truth right now, as I stand ankle-deep in toys, trying to put an earring on and realising after five minutes of jamming it into my earlobe that the reason it won’t go on is because I’m already wearing earrings, is that I don’t much care why it’s happening, only that it is.

On busy days, I find myself clock-watching, dying to put my son down for his nap so I can crack on with my tasks, only to suffer a complete blank the moment he goes to sleep.

I throw out spare electric cables in a desperate bid to declutter, convinced this will be the silver bullet that solves my organisational crisis, and weeks later realise they served specific and necessary purposes. On sweltering summer evenings I turn bottles of white wine into accidental Slush Puppies when I pop them in the freezer to chill and promptly forget about them. I stop to give my little boy a snack on a park bench and it’s 20 minutes before I realise I’ve left my handbag there.

Only women are expected to be able to 'do it all' and instead of grappling with that, I’m saying no. I opt out. Honestly? I’ve got more important things to worry about.

Nobody wants to be the first to admit they’re struggling but it isn’t serving me or anyone else to keep up the pretence. My baby and his ongoing and constantly shifting needs have expanded into my life the way gas fills a room, my career, relationship, social life and everything else I once took for granted left gasping in the corner. This is what Dr Sacks refers to as the "divided mind".

"I think of it like a lane in a motorway," she says. "Before you had a baby, you had one or two lanes. Your own needs are in one lane and in another lane there’s your partner or your friends and family. Now there’s a new lane and you can never turn it off, even when you’re at work. That’s a new demand in terms of your cognitive load."

In other words, new mums have a lot on our plates. But rather than try to hide that, I choose to own it, name it, and shout about it if need be. Yes, I have baby brain! I have a child whose needs are on my mind every single moment of the day and frankly, I now have less space in there for other things. Far from admitting defeat, that feels like rather a feminist move.

Does my husband grovel and self-flagellate when he misses a dentist appointment?

Does he walk into a meeting apology-first, admonishing himself for spending a single moment of his working day thinking about the tiny human at home who’s coming down with a cold again and who’s going to need a new winter coat soon and have we run out of Calpol and oh god what am I supposed to be discussing this morning?

No. Because busy people forget things. That’s not failure, that’s just part of being human. Only women are expected to be able to "do it all" and instead of grappling with that, I’m saying no. I opt out. Honestly? I’ve got more important things to worry about.

And actually, I’ve discovered, most people recognise this. I spent the first few months back at work after maternity leave upbraiding myself for what felt to me like unprecedented levels of ineptitude and disorganisation. But then a strange thing happened. I noticed that people didn’t mind, or if they did, they didn’t chastise me.

"Don’t worry at all," a colleague responded when I apologised for my late reply. "I know you’re busy."

Most of the time, nobody even noticed. I’d slip into press conferences 10 minutes late and no one would bat an eyelid. I’d have to rearrange appointments and people would simply open up their calendars and ask me when suited.

I used to despair but now I lean into it. "Sorry, I forgot," I say now with a shrug instead of a grimace. Because the truth is I can’t do it all, have it all, remember it all. Recognising that doesn't make me feel like a failure, it makes me feel free.

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Warning: The following includes images of self-harm scars, which some readers may find distressing.

Earlier this year, big name brands including Urban Decay, MAC and L’Oreal were applauded for posting pictures of models with ‘real’ skin on social media. Pores, freckles, spots, wrinkles and facial hair leapt proudly from the images, much to the delight of thousands of Instagram users worldwide, who were both happy and reassured to see actual texture instead of Photoshopped 'perfection'. Looking at and talking about skin in this way is a step in the right direction, of course, but it is also just the tip of the iceberg.

From vitiligo and stretch marks to scars and pigmentation, not enough light is shed on the variety of different skin types, textures and conditions that we have as individuals. But as part of our Skin Deep series, we’re aiming to do just that. Ahead, ten brilliant women open up about the unique relationships they have with their skin, because if this project has taught us anything at Refinery29, it’s that the affinity we have with our body’s largest organ is so much more than just skin deep.

Nadiya, 33

I don’t like my boobs in general - they have nothing of what 'nice boobs' are 'meant to look like' so I think I have zoned them out, which I find quite sad. I don’t even remember when they went from smooth to covered with stretch marks and small red veins, it is not like I have had any babies yet! I think it is because my weight has been up and down all my life, so my boobs have probably been on that journey with me. They are never something I look forward to revealing in an intimate situation, I have never really liked them, only when they are covered in a bra and well hidden behind clothes. They are also saggy. They have often prevented me of letting go in a sexual context to be honest. At the moment, for the first time in my life, I don’t mind them. My partner likes them and makes me feel like they are cute, and that the wobbliness is nice. I feel more comfortable with them now. They are weird and not picture perfect, but they feel soft and my partner makes me feel like they are the best. I learned from being on this photoshoot that I like them for what they are now. I would have never in a million years taken them out like that six months ago. If more women showed all of these 'skin imperfections' we would see that we all have them. I went away thinking that I should sit down more and talk about these things, because even small words helped.

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Sam, 22

I have Epidermolysis Bullosa, which means I get blisters all over my body and skin discolouration as a result. It's really patchy and quite severe. The blisters can get really painful. They vary in size but sometimes I get really big ones. Because of the pain I have to lance them with a needle every morning just to get them to go down. I put on an antiseptic cream and then a dressing. I was born with it and straight away I had blisters all over my skin. I was transferred to Great Ormond Street hospital and stayed there for a month for them to find out what it actually was. Other people's reactions are the biggest problem. If I lived in this world by myself I wouldn't know I was different. Throughout childhood I was constantly bullied and that was hard, and other people's perceptions of me break me down. In terms of intimacy and relationships, I tend to put a wall up. I'm terrified of someone seeing what I look like underneath [my clothes] and I push people away a lot. I try and cover it up as much as possible, but the way the pictures were taken and directed has helped me to see my skin through a different lens. I never thought I’d see my skin highlighted in an artistic way rather than in a negative light.

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Margo, 30

There's a really specific ideal in the press about what skin should look like. I'm a millennial, so I've lived through the days of Girls Aloud being bright orange and super-tanned and that was the norm. I've tried to emulate that with my own skin, but I'm extremely pale and have lots of freckles. I've probably spent thousands of pounds on fake tan over the years. I’m thirty and in recent years I got to a point where I realised it wasn't working. If I wasn’t trying to change my skin colour, I was trying to cover up my freckles. I used to go to makeup counters and their ambition was to cover up my freckles, so I was always given heavy, matte foundations. I had this ghost-like face that didn't match my skin tone or the rest of my freckly body. I'm happier with my freckles now and I don't tend to notice them until people point them out - at that point I do get self conscious. I remember scrolling through ASOS recently and noticed lots of models with freckles and I think it's amazing. I just hope it continues and doesn't become a fashionable fetish. Mainstream beauty looks like it is starting to become more plural. Historically, tanned European white skin has been treated as the standard, thus excluding women of colour. There is still long way to go, it can't be just a fad.

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I sometimes also get a red heat rash which can come about with a change of temperature or even when someone touches me. I'm a big fan of massages and I've had people comment on it, worrying I've got some kind of infectious disease or something! I also have a little Keratosis Pilaris on my arms, legs and butt. For a long time I didn't understand what it was – I used to exfoliate which wouldn't help and it just used to make my arms red raw. But at the same time, pretty much everyone has got it. It’s perfectly normal even though we're trying to hide it.

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Naomi, 25

Because I work in costume and textiles, I’m constantly creating and sewing, which means I’m confronted with my scars every day. Because I’m freelance, I need to network, and it’s the first thing people see when they shake my hand. I had a date last weekend and the guy said he noticed my scars first. I think my scars catch people out because I come across as such a happy go lucky person to other people. Everyone makes a judgement. For people, these scars are an insight into my mental health. I’m more aware of other people’s reactions. I’ve never liked wearing bracelets or rings because it drew more attention to my scars but people were staring so much, so I thought, let me give them something else to look at while they’re there! My scars are a part of me and my identity - the struggle I went through then has made me who I am now. I don’t cut anymore. My mum passed away recently and I thought about cutting again, but she hated it, so I refrained. Now I sew and make things to take my mind off self-harming.

Maddy, 57

I've had vitiligo all my life. It's an auto-immune disease, but my mum thinks it could be something to do with me having measles as a child. She has a couple of theories, but it was never really identified as a child and no-one was really interested. I had it all over my face but now my face is completely white, as are some of the hairs. It's pretty symmetrical elsewhere, though. I even have it in the hair on my head. If I'm on a beach, I'll go brown in all the places I still have pigment but in the whiter places I burn - I mean, really burn. My mum never made my vitiligo an issue - she was brilliant and I didn't hide it until I was a teenager and an adult. People used to say, "Why don't you cover it up?" But why would I want to? It's everywhere and I'd have to slap foundation on my hands and feet. I don't notice I've got it until somebody looks. I'm a teacher, so the kids will ask me about it. I've had some catty comments like, "Miss, your fake tan isn't very good," but I tell them it's just a skin condition. The bit that bothers me the most is my hair - it doesn't take dye very well so you end up spending a lot of money on hair dye, but I'm part of a vitiligo group on Facebook and it's nice because people talk about it. I've never been bothered about it, apart from my face because it was quite panda-like. I try not to get tanned because the only bit of brown I have left is a strip on my nose. Recently I've developed diabetes and that is connected to the vitiligo. You can have Hashimotos and gut problems - other auto-immune diseases tend to group together with this and people are just starting to find links. I'm actually a bit disappointed that some of my vitiligo has disappeared, though. Apparently, by the age of 50 you're supposed to have lost 50% of your pigment, so I've done quite well.

Lena, 18

I've never really thought about my stretch marks that much. I noticed them first on my mum when I was about seven years old, and I was like, "What are those?" She told me that stretch marks were normal and that people get them when they're growing up. I really liked my stretch marks when I was younger because they were like tiger stripes and every time I looked at them I thought they looked really cool. I didn't realise they were such a big deal for people until I got older. I realised that people in [magazines and online] didn't really have them and it took me a lot of time to understand that they were airbrushed and that they weren't real. Once I understood where stretch marks came from and what they were, I stopped caring about them. I did go through a phase of thinking that they might be getting a bit too stretched out so I thought about not gaining or losing too much weight to keeping things stable, but I know that stretch marks are normal and it's nothing I feel like I have to treat. What I don't want is for this whole era of body positivity to disappear and make way for another big movement. I want it to be a positive change forever, not just a fashion cycle.

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Kate, 26

I'm super-pale but I was even paler when I was younger and I used to get teased a lot because of it - they called me 'ghost girl' and told me my skin was see-through because you could literally see all of my veins. I never really got teased about my freckles, though. I've also got quite a big birthmark on my leg. I think it's weird that you can buy things to make it look like you have freckles. Gigi Hadid, one of the most beautiful models in the world, has all of her moles Photoshopped out. Why are freckles pretty and things like psoriasis isn't pretty? My housemate has thought about buying lightening creams online to get rid of her freckles, but my parents would always compliment me on mine. I think it's fun - sometimes I'll get a new freckle and I like spotting them. As I get older and I go on more holidays I notice I'll get a new patch, but I like that.

Nicola, 38

I was about five when my birthmark appeared, but they still call it a birth mark. I remember when it was first noticed, my mum and dad looked at me and wondered what was happening. They took me to loads of doctors and no-one really knew until one doctor confirmed it was just a birthmark. Sometimes people are born with them but they can appear a few years later. I didn't get many comments growing up, but I was so shy! I thought that if I made myself invisible, no-one would notice me. At primary school, kids would ask me if I'd been punched in the eye. It's only the last year that I've started talking about it; my best friends didn't know I felt that way. When I was seventeen, I discovered camouflage makeup thanks to the British Red Cross - they have a division that deals with scars and camouflage. I looked into laser treatment but they wouldn't do it because it was around my eye. I got my confidence from jars of makeup, but I realised that I was hiding and it's not a nice feeling. It stopped me in other parts of my life. Everyone has a version of my birthmark – it's a metaphor for something someone else might be hiding. This is the first time I've not carried my camouflage makeup in my bag. The emotional support has been great.

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Lottie, 22

I have scarring on my arms and thighs. It's weird because I forget they are there until I notice people looking at me. It's been five or six years since [I started to self harm] but I've never hidden the scarring which is quite shocking for some people because we're not used to people having scars on display. There's a big societal difference between having scars and having scars you've done to yourself , but if I was to hide, I'd be living in jeans and sweatshirts all the time and I overheat! It doesn't make me uncomfortable necessarily. There are times when I'll cover up, during job interviews or if I'm around lots of small children. I don't know why, but I think it's because my family always told me to. When I was a bridesmaid at my aunty's wedding, I had to wear a long sleeve. They told me I had to cover up, but I hadn't even thought it would be an issue because for me it isn't, it's everyone else's problem. It's odd because it's my skin.

The only time I ever feel self-conscious about it is when I'm at the beach in my bikini and you can see everything. People look, but don't tend to say anything. Kids will ask and I tend to say, "Oh, I got into a fight with a tiger, you should see him!"

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I'd finished my GCSEs and went to college and all of my friends went to sixth form, so I was really lonely and isolated and I'd been struggling with anxiety for years before then, but when I had no friends and no outlook, everything started spiralling and it was the only thing I could do to let everything out and to feel something again because I felt very numb. It just becomes an addiction and it was very hard to stop. My mum took me to the doctor who told me I just needed some friends and some summer plans, so I was like, "Great." That wasn't a success. I ended up in an inpatient unit before the referral to CAMS (Collaborative Assessment and Management of Suicidality) came. I don't know how we made it through that year – it affected the whole family.

Diane, 25

I've got a love-hate relationship with my freckles. When I was growing up it was more of a hate relationship, actually. I was picked on and boys would call me freckle face - even my sister would say things. I've never tried to cover them up with things like foundation because I feel weird when I do - my face looks blank, it looks odd. I don't know if, whether I could choose, I would choose to have them, but if someone came up to me and said, "Oh you can have a magical treatment to get rid of them," I don't think I would do it. I find it weird when people say that freckles are amazing and that they really want them. It's like, no, you don't. You want the cute ones across your nose - not freckles all over your body. I find the whole 'freckles are on trend' thing very odd. I saw someone wearing transfer freckles on the bus once and I found it a little bit... offensive? It shocked me and I didn't know how to feel about it. In magazines, freckles are on trend. Topshop brought out their freckle pencil. Designers had shows where they gave the models freckles. Why couldn't they just use models with real freckles? Growing up, you never really saw people with freckles as role models, other than Lindsay Lohan! I remember Meghan Markle saying that she always had her freckles covered up, so I think there's more positivity around them now. I'm very aware that I have to keep an eye on them and that there are a lot to keep an eye on. I've told my boyfriend to help me but I keep an eye on my moles more than anything.

If you or someone you know is considering self-harm, please get help. Call Mind on 0300 123 3393 or text 86463.*

Some names have been changed

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A new Louis Theroux film about polyamory airs on Sunday, and fans of the documentary king are in for a treat. (For a little taster of what's in store: one scene sees him blindfolded, semi-naked and being fed cheese by a topless woman at a "sensual eating workshop", which is just crying out to receive the No Context Louis treatment.)

In Love Without Limits, the much-loved journalist and documentary maker delves into the lively, often agonising world of "ethical non-monogamy". He travels to the US polyamory capital, Portland, Oregon, known for its motto "Keep Portland Weird", to immerse himself in the movement and meet families in various polyamorous arrangements. What he finds is a mixed bag: some take to it like ducks to water, while others are left consumed by jealousy, upset and brokenhearted.

As it’s easy to find holes in polyamory, I do completely understand why it works for some people

With nearly half of marriages in the US now ending in divorce, 2018 is the perfect time to investigate the relationship pioneers rewriting the rules of traditional monogamy and family life. With everyone from young Silicon Valley millennials to a British middle-aged, middle-class couple in the BBC drama Wanderlust apparently giving it a go, it was only a matter of time before the subject received the Theroux treatment.

At a recent preview of the film, Theroux said he believes that in 90% of polyamorous relationships there’s "one person who’s not getting as much out of it" as others, but that he also came to realise the downsides of monogamy while making the film. "Marriage evolved at a time when we didn’t live that long, so as much as it’s easy to find holes in polyamory, I do completely understand why it works for some people.

"In a nutshell you’re choosing between jealousy and boredom – do you want to live a life in which you’re dealing with really awkward and difficult jealousies and a sense of insecurity but having quite a fun and exciting time, or go into a semi-narcotised boredom where you feel a lot safer?"

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Theroux’s wife Nancy Strang, with whom he has three children, was apparently totally fine with him stripping off in front of – and being touched by – a group of naked strangers during shooting. "She’s a very understanding and cool person. She’s not the kind of person to be insecure or get in a flap about something like that – [afterwards] she probably just said something like, 'Fine, whatever, by the way you still haven’t taken out the rubbish,' or some random thing that I’d failed to do."

Love Without Limits is the first in a new three-part series, Altered States, which sees him tackle the universal themes of birth, death and relationships. In Take My Baby he investigates adoption, while in Choosing Death he explores euthanasia, both in California. Most adoptions in the state are carried out privately as part of a multimillion dollar industry, and pregnant women can receive up to $50,000 for giving up their newborn to adoptive parents, while agencies, facilitators and lawyers can earn thousands of dollars per baby.

Naturally, while making the films he came to reflect on his own marriage and mortality, he told the audience at the recent event. "The death one really gives you perspective on the important things," he said, adding that he was struck by the fullness of the lives his subjects were about to leave behind.

In what makes for sensitive viewing, Theroux meets birth mothers preparing to hand over their babies, some of whom have histories of poverty, addiction and abuse, which can push women down the adoption path. He also meets prospective parents, who are often left unsure as to whether the birth mother will actually give her child away once it's born.

California is also one of the six US states that now offer the terminally ill the option of ending their life with a prescribed cocktail of drugs, and in Choosing Death, Theroux uncovers some of the moral dilemmas involved when you have complete autonomy over your own death.

These stories all "have something a touch utopian about them, involving a kind of idealism and forward thinking that brings new opportunities but also new risks," Theroux said in a statement. This year's miniseries follows on from last year's Dark States, in which Theroux investigated three "uniquely devastating challenges" facing the US: murder, sex trafficking, and opiate dependency.

Theroux has delved into such a vast array of subjects by this point in his career that he takes unusual, unexpected situations – of which there are many in Altered States – in his stride. "I just try and be a decent person," he said at the preview screening. "Having glasses and being a bit of a geek probably doesn’t hurt. I’m naturally quite a tentative and insecure person and paradoxically sometimes that has its advantages. I think people can see me maybe as someone who actually isn’t going to be a bully and who is basically trying very hard to read signals that are coming back and not be a dick."

It’s this awkwardness and willingness to take things at face value that has left him with legions of young fans and an almost cult-like following. He’s regularly the subject of memes and GIFs, has been emblazoned on T-shirts, had club nights dedicated to him and even inspired tattoos, and Refinery29 wanted to hear Theroux’s take on it. Does this not creep him out at all?

They dance around in masks of me – of Louis Theroux – because it isn’t really me, it’s the TV guy

"I think it’s really good," he said. "Twenty years ago when I made the first series of Weird Weekends, I’m embarrassed to say that I dreamed it would be around for years and years... I was very young and ambitious and maybe... I felt in some ways angry and thwarted and that my voice wasn’t being heard. Like many people in their early 20s I was full of my own dreams and I went into Weird Weekends thinking, 'This is going to be a legendary TV show and I’ll commit everything to it and to making it special and different'."

Theroux also had "a sense of insecurity and that [he] needed to over deliver" because he thought he "wasn’t naturally talented enough" or "someone who should naturally be on TV", he continued. Luckily, that crisis of confidence didn't last long.

"So the idea that people are still watching it and that younger people are discovering it and finding things to enjoy in it is very satisfying. I dreamed that would happen and it did happen. Some of the memes I don’t really get, and the Louis Theroux themed nights. It’s obviously become its own thing. On one level I don’t totally understand it but maybe that’s partly the point. They dance around in masks of me – of Louis Theroux – because it isn’t really me, it’s the TV guy."

'Love Without Limits' airs on BBC Two at 9pm on Sunday 4th November. 'Choosing Death' airs on BBC Two at 9pm on Sunday 18th November. 'Take My Baby' airs on BBC Two at 9pm on Sunday 25th November.

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Do you remember the glory of the '00s high street? Recall the thrill of convincing your mum to buy you a faux fur gilet or a high-sheen bodycon dress (for going out-out, of course) from Warehouse? The brand often reached smaller towns before giants like Topshop and H&M, and as such, has become a mainstay of our collective nostalgia.

But you’d be foolish to overlook the retailer in 2018. Since 2016, it has undergone a renaissance of sorts, evolving from a forgotten relic of the pre-online-shopping world into a comeback kid, collaborating with global influencers, and – most importantly – producing fresh and contemporary pieces that we really want to wear.

Now positioned as 'women’s fashion curated for the city', Warehouse has gone from strength to strength since its 40th birthday rebrand and subsequent AW16 collection. How has it claimed its place in our wardrobes among a sea of socially savvy Insta-brands, exciting mid-range designers and cheap-as-chips fast fashion retailers?

"Our collections are seasonally on-trend and given our in-house designed approach to both print and product, we know we can offer something more unique in a crowded marketplace. Like any other fashion retailer, Warehouse has had to embrace the ever-changing world that we live in," Paula Stewart, Warehouse’s brand director, tells Refinery29. "Our online store is equally as important as our physical high street presence."

Having worked with the likes of journalist Pandora Sykes, influencer Lucy Williams and founder of The WW Club, Phoebe Lovatt, the brand has engaged its audience through the personal style of Instagram’s most-followed. While it would be great to see Warehouse work with a more diverse lineup of influencers, there’s no doubt that their focus has shifted towards modern working women with as much to say to their customers as to inspire their wardrobes.

"We know our customer well so she is at the centre of everything we do. We know the silhouettes and the fabrics she likes and this is the backbone to our collections. The design team look at all the trends influencing the season, from street style to vintage, and curate a collection that is relevant for our woman, from modern wardrobe essentials to 'must haves' for the season."

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What can we look forward to this AW18? "The frontrunner of the season so far has definitely been animal – our green leopard print sold faster than we could have imagined," Stewart explains. "The rest of the collection definitely takes a more directional approach to classic British dressing with heritage checks and relaxed fit trouser suits. A key seasonal staple for us is knitwear, we have some great new shapes plus standout pieces like our Fair Isle chunky knits which are perfect worn over longer length dresses."

Alongside '70s tan and honey tones, pastel-hued corduroy and paisley prints, there’s also the brand’s collaboration with beloved British designer Ashish. The sequin-spangled collection, which launches this month, has party season covered, with egg yolk yellow trench coats and disco ball silver jumpsuits getting you through every event in the winter calendar in style.

As for our favourite pieces of the season? Warehouse’s reversible trench coat (on one side a green tartan, on the other a classic neutral shade), the loud-and-proud zebra print dress, which we’ll be wearing with black Western boots, and the faux fur leopard coat, which will not only keep us warm this winter but remain a classic for quite some time.

We may have more choice than ever thanks to an expanding British high street, but Warehouse has proved over the last few seasons that it’s got the direction and design to keep us loyal, even after all these years.

Shop our favourite pieces from Warehouse now:

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Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop is one of the most controversial (and most lucrative) health and wellness brands going, but the fuss has been largely confined to the US – until now. The company has been reported for breaching UK advertising regulations.

Goop opened its first UK store in west London's Notting Hill in September and ships items from its online store to Europe, so it was only a matter of time before European sceptics began asking questions.

Last week, the brand was referred to the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) and National Trading Standards for making 113 misleading statements by the Good Thinking Society, a UK-based charity that promotes scientific thinking. The charity accuses Goop of making "misleading and potentially dangerous claims", including to expectant mothers.

The charity's findings, as reported by The Sunday Times, flag several products, including:

• The Mother Load (£88), a "top-of-the-line natal protocol" marketed to women who are pregnant or planning to get pregnant. According to its ingredients list, the product contains 110% of the recommended daily value of vitamin A for adults. This is despite the NHS and World Health Organisation warning pregnant women against taking supplements containing vitamin A because of the potential risk of "harm[ing] your unborn baby".

• Sun protection products costing up to £45. The site claims there to be "little evidence to support the (many) claims that sunscreen helps prevent cancer." This is in direct contrast to assertions from the British Association of Dermatologists, which state: "A sunscreen with a high SPF (sun protection factor) will help block UVB rays and prevent the skin from burning, and by extension damage that can cause skin cancer."

• The Goop Medicine Bag (£76), a selection of "health-giving" stones, including carnelian, which a Goop blogpost claimed "helps treat infertility". The post was later edited to say the claims were based on the beliefs of fans of the product rather than scientific fact.

Laura Thomason, project leader at the Good Thinking Society, told Refinery29 the charity was prompted to report the company after watching Gwyneth Paltrow’s recent BBC Breakfast News interview, "when she dismissed critics’ accusations that Goop promotes pseudoscience and said 'any time you try to move the needle, to empower women, you find resistance.' I then visited the website and found it was full of misleading, pseudoscientific content, some of which I believe could be potentially harmful.

"Advertisers must abide by advertising law," Thomason added, saying the charity hopes "Goop will stop making misleading advertising claims and that any potentially harmful products are removed from sale."

The charity outlined the dangers of people, particularly women, believing unproven health claims. "Our complaints highlighted some very specific potential dangers, such as the risk of vitamin A to unborn babies and the risk of not using sunscreen. Other critics have highlighted specific dangers associated with the use of vaginal 'eggs'," Thomason added, referring to the $145,000 the company was forced to pay out in a US lawsuit over unscientific claims about its vaginal eggs.

Being misled by unproven health claims is the very opposite of empowerment

"We are also concerned about the indirect risks of disregarding the need for evidence and of presenting alternative medicine in a glamorous light. We often hear of tragic cases where patients are persuaded to ignore their doctors’ advice and to instead follow the advice of alternative healers, making very dangerous health decisions."

The Good Thinking Society also wants to deter other brands from making potentially dangerous claims that have no scientific backing. "We hope that any media attention will discourage other advertisers from making similar claims, and will also help raise awareness among the general public regarding the issues."

Thomason believes the public are inclined to believe health claims made by public figures like Paltrow because "although celebrities don’t necessarily have any relevant training or knowledge of health issues, we nevertheless have a tendency to look up to them and are more likely to trust them, or even to see them as role models."

She continued: "It can be tempting to buy into health and beauty advice given by a successful – and healthy and beautiful! – Hollywood actor, particularly if she also talks of female empowerment. However, being misled by unproven health claims is the very opposite of empowerment."

In a recent blogpost, the eminent Goop critic Dr Jen Gunter, a gynaecologist, obstetrician and vaginal health expert, reviewed 161 of the company's wellness products and found that "the majority of health products (90%) could not be supported by science."

"There is no evidence to support Gwyneth Paltrow’s claim that Goop is free of pseudoscience," Gunter concluded, referring to Paltrow's recent claims on BBC News. "In fact the opposite is true, Goop is a classic example of pseudoscience profiteering. The bulk of their products are useless, but some could be harmful."

In a statement to Refinery29, Dr Susan Beck, senior vice president of science and research at Goop, said the Mother Load supplements are safe during pregnancy "when used as recommended". She continued that it "contains a very moderate 450 mcg (1500 IU) of vitamin A (preformed vitamin A as retinyl palmitate), which is less than the recommended daily intake of 600 mcg per day (per NHS).

"The 4000 IU beta-carotene included in Mother Load is only converted in the body to vitamin A as needed, and there is no safety concern for eating this, as there would be no safety concern for eating a large number of carrots containing beta-carotene. The Mother Load package contains a warning that pregnant women should not consume more than 10,000 IU vitamin A daily due to risk of birth defects."

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Amy Schumer is getting into the Halloween spirit, even if it’s in an unconventional way.

The actress recently announced her pregnancy on Twitter by cleverly hiding it in a political post. On Sunday, she gave fans an update; the actress and comedian shared a photo of herself slumped over a dining table, next to a photo of a murder scene from the movie Se7en. She captioned it “first tri had me like.”

The 1995 film stars Brad Pitt and Morgan Freeman as detectives chasing a serial killer. The killer murders people in ways that represent the seven deadly sins. Schumer chose a photo from the first murder, gluttony, in which a man eats until his stomach explodes.

The choice was darkly appropriate; early pregnancy usually comes with both nausea and increased appetite, an unpleasant combination. Fans who had been there before were quick to reassure her. “First trimester tiredness is so real.” one wrote. Others said the rest would be easier; "I feel ya, it gets better."

The first trimester may seem like a horror movie, but fortunately, Schumer seems to have plenty of support— and a good sense of humour.

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Welcome to Refinery29’s career column Advice From A Nice Girl. Every month, readers can ask Fran Hauser, bonafide boss and author of the book The Myth Of The Nice Girl , their hardest career quandaries, from managing your overly emotional boss to overcoming your biggest work fear. But this advice column comes with a twist — the reader has to take Fran’s advice and report back.

This month, we hear from a 25-year-old marketing analyst working in tech who is trying to get the courage to advocate for herself in order to get a promotion she really wants.

Question: I'm in the process of applying for a promotion at my current company, which involves submitting an updated CV and an interview. I’m typically a confident person, but I have a difficult time advocating for myself in the workplace and have anxiety about feeling like an imposter. What’s the best way to tackle this?

Fran's Advice: Updating your CV can work to your benefit in this case. You have the chance to put your accomplishments in writing, along with concrete data that support them. Be sure to include metrics for concrete wins, noting a percentage increase or an absolute number of how your work met or surpassed goals. For instance, the marketing program you launched saw a 30% increase in new newsletter subscribers or social followers. Cut through the jargon and focus on the facts. The goal is to show your employer just how valuable your work is to the company—and remind yourself of it, too.

For the interview, preparing and having a positive mindset is essential. The more confident you are the better you’ll perform. To boost your confidence, look back at your new CV and the great things you’ve done. Also, ask yourself: Why do I deserve this? How have I added value? Come up with strong answers to both those questions ahead of time. You want to have three solid sound bites at the ready, and make sure you squeeze them into the conversation no matter what the interviewer asks. It can be about your wins, about why you want this promotion, or the added value you provide to the company if you are promoted. You can even ask your friends to mock interview you so you have it down.

Ask yourself: Why do I deserve this? How have I added value?

During the meeting, keep your energy up and be aware of your tone. You want to come across as passionate and energetic about getting this promotion. Own the room, take up space — you can even stand if it seems appropriate!

Before the meeting comes to an end, bring up your sound bites or your most important points if you didn’t get a chance to say something. Don’t leave the room without making them heard. Focus on future accomplishments and opportunities, too, not just past experiences. Say something like, “Based on what I know, here’s where I think the biggest opportunities are.” It’s refreshing to interview someone who shows awareness and a strong point of view. At the end of the day, what will impact their decision is how well you prove that you’re good for business and will continue to be a valuable employee.

The Follow-up: First, I started improving my CV (I utilised a free template on Canva) and made sure to include a bio that popped, concrete numbers, and a strong design. Then, I did a few mock interviews with my friends and asked them to surprise me with interview questions. I even rehearsed my sound bites in the mirror while getting ready every day. Ultimately, my interview responses had a nice balance between my strengths and bringing it back to the business.

The team was extremely impressed with my CV! In addition, both of the managers and my senior director could tell how much I prepared for the process, as it showed through my thoughtful responses and the way I presented myself on the day of the interview. The interviews really felt like informal conversations, and I didn’t have anything to be afraid of, but the preparation truly paid off. I found out a week later in my one-on-one with my manager that I got the promotion!

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Beauty with Mi, hosted by Refinery29's beauty writer Mi-Anne Chan, explores the coolest new trends, treatments, products, and subcultures in the beauty world. Never miss an episode by subscribing here.

Update: Two years after microblading my brows, I've found myself reaching for gels and pencils to fill them in once again. My permanent makeup artist Emilia Berry mentioned that the ink would start to fade within one to two years and like clockwork, they have. In the video below, I share my experience getting my eyebrows touched up, as well as how to keep them looking fresh for as long as possible.

This story was originally published April 03, 2018.

Microblading is a semi-permanent makeup technique used to fill in and define your eyebrow s. A certified aesthetician uses a pen-like handheld blade with 12 to 15 microneedles to make tiny hair-like incisions along the shape of your brows. The small cuts only pierce the top layers of the skin and are then dyed with pigment to give naturally full looking eyebrows.

The technique comes with a slight pinch, much like eyebrow threading, and the end-result lasts a month until touch-up. Microblading is great for those with over-plucked or overwaxed brows, very fair blonde brows and if you’re looking to save some time shaping your brows every morning.

When it comes to experimenting with brow shaping techniques, we've tried virtually everything. From Nyx's absurdly affordable gel to Glossier's instant sell-out, Boy Brow, our quest for that perfect arch has tested a constellation of the internet's favourite high- and low-end products.

When it comes to thinner brow lines, pumping up the volume can still be a daily challenge, since encouraging those hairs to grow back after years of enthusiastic plucking or waxing is a notorious struggle. Given the beauty world's obsession with bold brows, see Lily Collins' Twitter-famous ones, maintaining a luxurious, thick set can quickly lead to investing in an arsenal of pricey powders and tinters.

Enter Tinel, our unflinching microblading technician. Using a blade composed of 12 tiny needles, this innovative process deposits pigment beneath the skin under your eyebrows, leaving behind tattoo-inspired strokes that amplify the fullness and shape of natural arches. The obvious benefit? Say goodbye to that makeup bag crammed with eyebrow-enhancing products, because microblading eliminates the need for everyday maintenance, though occasional touch-ups are usually necessary over time.

Of course, newbies to microblading often worry that their freshly-boosted brows will come with pain during the procedure — and you're not wrong. "It might hurt," Tinel says with a knowing smile. But we definitely can't argue with the results. After one session, R29 staffer Natasha, and our intrepid tester, saw clear improvement to her once-sparse hairs and wakes up each morning with immaculate brows, no upkeep required. Reporting on the pain factor, she bravely says that "it's tolerable."

Watch the video above for an up-close look at Natasha's microblading experience and its gorgeous effects. Spoiler: get ready to visit your ASMR happy-place with those zoomed-in shots of her brows getting brushed and trimmed.

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And then a hero comes along. Misty Copeland has made history as the first-ever Black principal dancer for the American Ballet Theater, and one of the most well-known prima ballerinas of all time, whose presence has permeated the culture at large. (See: her powerful, super-viral Under Armour ad, her upcoming role alongside Keira Knightley and other A-list movie stars in The Nutcracker and the Four Realms, and much more.)

But before a young Copeland had taken her first ballet class at a Boys & Girls’ Club – before an astute teacher recognised her raw, once-in-a-generation talent – she endured a chaotic, nomadic childhood that included living in a motel and on food stamps. One of her few respites? “I was the one kid in my family that wasn’t really attached to anything . . . no sports. The only thing that I was obsessed with was Mariah Carey,” Copeland tells Refinery29’s global editor-in-chief and co-founder Christene Barberich in this week’s UnStyled. “I’m MC, and she’s MC. She was a huge influence in my life.”

Copeland tells Barberich about the effects of her “crazy upbringing” alongside many siblings, a struggling mom, and shifting father figures. “Picking up and moving and always having to change schools, all of these things created this anxiety. That made me extremely introverted. And then, the traumas of witnessing all these different environments – there was a lot of emotional and physical abuse as well. So I became this shell of a person.”

When Copeland was 7, she and her family had moved to yet another home, and Mariah Carey’s debut album dropped. “I think my oldest brother Doug was the one that told us about her:, ‘There’s this biracial woman...I think she’s 19, and her voice is unbelievable.’”

“[My baby brother Cameron] would cry whenever we'd get into the car, and my mom would put Mariah Carey's tape in and he would just stop crying,” Copeland says. “[Mariah] became ours, and she looked similar to my mother. Not until I was an adult and living on my own and dancing professionally did I realise like why she impacted me so much,” she says. “I think it was just being able to see myself in someone else.”

She continues: “Being a biracial girl, and my family being every ethnicity, and seeing someone succeeding that looking like me — I don’t think I realised like the power of representation at that point.”

Now that Copeland has become a bonafide icon in her own right, she knows she wields the same kind of symbolic power as well. “It’s how I relate to the youth now. Being a Black woman, on the stage at the Metropolitan Opera House, simply by seeing that, a young brown kid can envision that that could be their future without even really consciously knowing it.”

Copeland and Carey have yet to meet in person – but the dancer was emboldened recently to finally DM the “Vision of Love” singer via Instagram. Find out what happened, and much more about Copeland’s extraordinary journey and hardships overcome, by clicking here and subscribing to UnStyled via Apple Podcasts today.

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Admittedly, Halloween is my second favourite holiday after Christmas. I love dressing up, going to "haunted" attractions, and just getting to be someone/thing else for a night. But, every year when autumn creeps in, beyond the excitement, I start to feel a tinge of dread. Racist, sexist, and just overall offensive costumes are as inevitable as pumpkin spice lattes and as someone working in media, I'm usually tasked with covering them in one way or another.

I've done countless stories on people dressed in blackface; as rape survivors; as Indigenous people. I've written earnest tweets condemning such costumes, providing historical context explaining why these getups are so vile.

But this year, I am not taking the bait.

For years, it's been standard to call out every person who decided to don blackface, and dress up as Hitler or Nazis; to explain why costumes that made light of sexual assault weren't funny. The reasoning was, if you shamed these people hard enough publicly, if you chased them off social media, they would learn their lesson and understand why their costume was offensive and in poor taste. But after years of participating in this culture in some form, I've realised it's pointless.

Why? Because chances are people dressing their kids as Hitler and cartoonishly slathering their faces with black paint under the guise of dressing like a Black celebrity already know the costume is wrong. They know the racist history of blackface and minstrel shows. They know the horrors of the Holocaust and the pain the swastika symbol inflicts. They know that for Indigenous people a headdress has cultural significance.

They simply want to get a rise out of what they label as "social justice warriors." For them PC culture has ruined Halloween; liberals have taken the fun out of everything and made everything cultural appropriation. Divisiveness is their game and for too long we've all been unsuspecting players. This is the year I opt out.

Last week, explosive devices were sent to prominent Democratic officials and people who often draw the ire of President Donald Trump. In Kentucky, two elderly Black people were murdered by a white man with a history of racism. On Saturday, 11 people we shot dead inside a Pittsburgh synagogue by a man who yelled "All Jews must die!" and believed in racist conspiracy theories peddled by the president and other conservatives. Violent rhetoric and conspiracy theories don't just live online; hateful words and memes don't stay in the far corners of the internet on obscure message boards. The words go from lines of code on the internet to violence in the real world. A racist meme shared thousands of times on Facebook and Twitter may seem like an inconsequential joke to some, but it's a call to action for a hateful, unhinged person.

In the face of such horrific acts of hate and cruelty, it'd be foolish of me to devote time explaining to a person why their Ku Klux Klan costume is tasteless; why their Nazi soldier uniform is not an edgy nod to history. I'm not dignifying these attention seeking trolls.

Words and actions have consequences. If you're going to make the "mistake" of dressing up as something racist this year to be contrarian and controversial (at the risk of losing your job and reputation, too), be my guest. At this moment in time, there are real horrors to be dealt with that will be here long after the last trick-or-treater goes home on Halloween night.

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The music industry still hasn’t figured out a way to rectify the fact that some of the people who are allowed to step through its doors and flourish are also reckless, predatory, and, in some cases, dangerous. Unless an artist is speaking out about an injustice done against them — like when Meek Mill was sent to jail earlier this year — the impact of crimes that celebrities commit against others is often swept under the rug as the business of performances and promotion go on without a hitch. In other words, the industry has no clue what to do with men that bring in a lot of cash despite doing really horrible things. And there is no better evidence of this than the stories that have come out about two Gen-Z rappers.

Tekashi69 (also stylized 6ix9ine) is probably breathing a sigh relief right now. Rather than serve any jail time, the 22-year-old rapper (real name Daniel Hernandez) was sentenced to four years probation on Friday for sexual misconduct involving a 13-year-old. The act was filmed and posted online in 2015, Hernandez later plead guilty to the use of a child in a sexual performance. According to Vulture, his admission was given under a “youthful offender” plea agreement that required him to obtain a GED, perform 300 hours of community service, and stay out of trouble. Hernandez failed to adhere to these requirements when he was arrested twice in 2018 — once for assaulting a 16-year-old fan and again after a traffic stop where he was also accused of assaulting an officer — prompting prosecutors to push for jail time during his sentencing on Friday.

In the wake of a decision that keeps him out of jail and able to continue building his career in music, it's understandable that Hernandez would be in a triumphant mood. He threw a party later that night to celebrate (the same party where his bodyguard was apparently shot). What I don’t understand is why media outlets like The Shade Room appear to be celebrating right alongside him. The Instagram-forward platform that boasts over 14 million followers not only broke news of Hernandez’s legal outcome, but reposted several cheerfully-toned pictures of him smiling and celebrating his daughter’s birthday. On Sunday, Power 105.1 — the nationally recognised NYC hip-hop radio station — hosted its annual Powerhouse NYC concert, bringing Tekashi69 out as surprise performer. The station released the following statement after the event, “Tekashi 6ix9ine receives a lot of hate from the media, but we got the opportunity to see the real 6ix9ine.”

What is clear from hip-hop’s treatment of both of these men is that institutions that help make big stars like XXXtentacion and Tekashi69 are still operating without a framework of social consciousness.

Before XXXtentacion (neé Jahseh Onfroy) was fatally shot in June, he was facing charges that included aggravated battery of a pregnant victim, false imprisonment, domestic battery by strangulation, and witness tampering. Harrowing testimony from his victim sent the internet into an uproar and sparked a debate about censorship when platforms like Spotify sought strip his music from their curated playlists. Since his death, Onfroy has been uplifted by other music industry players as a tragic martyr of creativity and talent in hip-hop. He posthumously won Best New Artist at this year’s BET Awards, and just last week, producer Mally Mall told The Cruz Show that Onfroy has unreleased music in which he collaborated with Rihanna and The Weeknd that will be coming out soon. That same week, audio recordings surfaced of Onfroy admitting to being violent towards his then-partner and participating in several stabbing incidents.

What is clear from hip-hop’s treatment of both of these men is that institutions that help make big stars like XXXtentacion and Tekashi69 are still operating without a framework of social consciousness. The music industry still hasn't been taken to task for repeatedly empowering men who prey upon and abuse women. James Brown, Ike Turner, Bobby Brown, R. Kelly, and Phil Spector have left a long legacy of ignored misogyny and sexist violence in the music industry. No matter how public or abominable the accusation, though, the beat literally goes on for these men and their careers. While the television and film industry slowly but surely moves to untangle the mess of its own institutionalised sexism in the wake of #MeToo, their musical counterpart has turned up the volume refused to listen.

I won’t pretend to have the answers. I think that our inclination to use a binary system of cancellation and standom for our favourite celebrities is counterproductive. It's true that the heinous actions of these artists don't cancel out their talent. Nor are they justifications for either of them to die, as some extremists suggested after Onfroy's death. However, platforms and companies that have the power to amplify the voices of artists to reach millions of ears, eyes, and hearts have a responsibility to at least engage in conversations about the systemic nature of misogyny. They certainly should not ignore issues of consent that plague so many of their male artists. Sure, listeners should engage in ethical consumption of the music they love. But at what point do we demand more of radio stations, media sites, artists with huge independent platforms, and record labels? How long do rapists, abusers, and predators get to be big elephants in a room that sounds really good? When do we demand that violence against women be taken seriously?

If you have experienced sexual violence of any kind, please visit Rape Crisis or call 0808 802 9999.

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As the November nights draw in and the weather gets even chillier, the good folks at Netflix have our backs.

This month, the streaming giant is adding some fantastic films, including the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy, Alicia Vikander and Michael Fassbender in romantic drama The Light Between Oceans, superb civil rights biopic Selma, and Hilary Swank weepie P.S. I Love You.

Oh, and if A Christmas Prince was your guilty pleasure last festive season, this month brings the sequel. It's called A Christmas Prince: The Royal Wedding. Wherever could they have got that idea from?

There's also the final season of House of Cards – with the majestic Robin Wright centre stage as president – and brand new episodes of must-watch US sitcom The Good Place.

Click through to see the key new titles – and their release dates – on Netflix this November.

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I spend a lot of my time poring over and writing about bold (and sometimes questionable) beauty looks from fashion week and Instagram, and makeup artists such as Katie Jane Hughes and Terry Barber are two Insta favourites who aren’t afraid to rock the beauty boat and push the boundaries. If you aren't already obsessed, Barber takes inspiration from mundane objects like kitchen sinks or cold cuts of meat to whip up all manner of looks, while Katie makes a case for vinyl orange lids, glitter lips and sunset eyeshadow. Neither artist conforms to the 'usual' beauty ideals we see on social media – there are no uniform cut creases or sharp winged eyeliner here. Everything is much quirkier.

I look at these creations in awe and am floored by the skill, creativity and effort. But after browsing, I put my phone away and apply the same 'basic' makeup look I’ve worn since my teenage years. So I got to wondering how the alternative makeup looks I’m impressed by would translate into everyday life. Could they inspire me to be bolder? Would I feel embarrassed, liberated, or both? I stopped caring what other people thought about me a while ago, so in the name of research, I gave five very out-there trends a go. As that cheesy (possibly made up) Instagram saying goes: "People will stare, make it worth their while." Well, I'm going to try.

Yellow blusher

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A post shared by Jess Cohen (@jdcmua) on Aug 25, 2018 at 9:31am PDT

I start by easing myself in with an alternative and colourful trend: yellow blusher. I’ve seen it pop up in beauty editorials and Instagram selfies galore lately, and people somehow manage to make it look passable. I created my blusher using MUA’s Silent Disco Eyeshadow Palette – the yellow hue, Techno, is bright enough to stand out on my cheeks, which are usually dusted with pink blush. I can report it’s very difficult to blend the colour yellow. I try to help the situation by extending the colour slightly into my eyeshadow – have I made it look worse? I add a stroke of black eyeliner for, er, contrast, but the citrus shade doesn’t go well with my colouring. I look like I'm suffering from a tropical disease.

Heading out, I decide to try and preserve my dignity via my clothes, which I’ve kept quite plain in an attempt to counteract my off-the-wall face. I can’t decide if this helps or makes me look even kookier. My boyfriend notes that I look like That Yellow Bastard from the Sin City comics; a niche reference, but not inaccurate. I ask my Uber driver what he thinks of my blush and he confesses he's "seen stranger things" – I don’t think he means the TV show.

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After a while, going about your day you tend to forget what's on your face – and why people are looking. I pop into Marks & Spencer, and find a stunning new season knit in matching mustard. Would it be too much? I’m getting stares and conclude this look is a step too far for old M&S. I must leave and find my people. Perhaps an art gallery next time?

Vinyl lids and matching lips

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I’m more hopeful about this one. Vinyl lids always look so cool and '80s. Makeup artist Katie Jane Hughes manages to look pretty yet seriously edgy when she wears the look, but I have neither her skill nor her cheekbones. I used MUA’s Silent Disco Palette once again, adding purple shade, Electro, to my eyes and Estée Lauder's Pure Colour Envy in Vengeful Red on my lips. I grabbed the cheapest clear lip gloss I could find for this look, as it wasn’t something I had in my makeup bag. I opted for Miss Sporty, purely because it was £2.99.

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While I don’t despise this, I look like Ursula The Sea Witch, who, let’s be honest, is a legend. I take this look on public transport and within five minutes, things have gone awry. The wind has blown my fringe into my (very sticky) eyes, which are also slightly dripping at the outer corners. My vinyl lips look ultra shiny but I daren’t move or talk and I can’t drink my tea.

I snap a selfie as the man opposite looks on in bewilderment. I meet my best friend and say nothing, trying to pretend I look normal. She immediately asks why I "look like Boy George". I admit I did make a beeline for the nearest Boots, using the makeup station tissues and mirror to wipe off the majority of the gloss, but more for practicality than embarrassment. Vinyl makeup is a no from me.

Pressed flowers

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After Preen’s SS17 catwalk featured models adorned with pressed flowers, thanks to makeup artist Val Garland, I’ve seen Instagram squares filled with foliage. Strangely, I’ve yet to see someone wear this IRL. For today’s makeup, I choose to use a classic English flower – the hydrangea. I’ve pre-pressed the petals, which is already 100 times more effort than I’ve put into my makeup for the last decade. Does this count as gardening? I stick these on with hairspray, a little eyelash glue and blind hope. Is eyelash glue safe to use on my cheeks, I wonder? Who knows, but it's probably best not to google. It’s a good job I work for myself as my boss (me) is very understanding of my office attire.

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Later, I go to the supermarket and take my flowers with me. Perusing the cereal aisle, I try to ignore staff and customers' double-takes. "You could be going to or coming from a festival!" I repeat to myself in my head. I am looking down more, using my hair as a shield. As I panic-fill my basket in order to leave swiftly, disaster strikes and I lose three flowers to the supermarket floor. Much later, I lie on my bed, not unlike Sir John Everett Millais' "Ophelia". My boyfriend asks: "Just how long are you going to keep those on for?" But I've grown quite attached to my flowers by this point and would totally work this look again – perhaps for Glastonbury, rather than a food shop, though...

Black scribble eyeliner

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This is less of a bold beauty look and more of an on-face Art Attack, but after designer Junya Watanabe had models strut the runway with doodle-like scribbles on their face, many makeup homages followed suit.

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Makeup artists Val Garland and Terry Barber are also advocates of the extreme eyeliner trend. I used Maybelline's Master Precise Liquid Eyeliner Pen and got scribbling. My attempt was more, let’s say, abstract than the intricate flower doodles I spied on Instagram. I don’t quite know what occasion this look would be appropriate for, but apparently it's not dinner – my friend says I look "quite like Mike Tyson", who isn’t someone I ever thought I’d be likened to, if I’m honest. I also realise I’m prone to frequently rubbing my eyes, which doesn’t mix well with the black scribbles. Would I ever wear this again? Perhaps for a Beetlejuice -themed Halloween party.

"Snogged off" lips

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When MAC posts a beauty look to Instagram, you know it’s soon going to be 'a thing'. They shared this image – captioned "lollipop lips at @preenbythorntonbregazzi by @thevalgarland" – of a look created by the legendary makeup artist for Preen's AW17 catwalk show. She told Vogue: "It's about kissing and snogging. This girl goes clubbing, she’s confident and she loves kissing." Val used MAC’s Lipmix  and smudged out the line, then used a bigger brush to buff out the lipstick. She then applied gloss "within the lip line but not outside it".

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This has a slight Heath Ledger as The Joker feel about it. I don’t understand how models manage to look okay in this; I think I look the worst I have all week. I tried (I really did) to make this look passable, carefully buffing a touch of red lipstick around my mouth, then adding the rest to my lips, but to no avail. To say it doesn’t look good would be an understatement. The men next to me in Starbucks certainly seem confused, and the barista looks at my mouth for about five seconds too long. I do enjoy the air of mystery it gives me, though. Have I a) Just had a really good snog in the toilets? Or b) Really enjoyed my croissant? I send a selfie to my oldest friend and ask how she thinks it looks. I get one word back: "Terrible." Well, that’s the end of that. This could be a great one to try if, like me, you’re never happy with the neatness of your lipstick line, or smudge it within five minutes. I’m usually exclaiming "the lipstick!" when my boyfriend tries to kiss me goodbye, but today he notes he "can’t make it look worse than it already does". Call me a makeup bore, but I don’t think I’ll be trying this again anytime soon.

The verdict

In conclusion, none of these looks had any positive feedback. They pushed me so far outside my beauty comfort zone. I think I’ll try to be braver with my looks in future (perhaps not snogged-lips-brave, though), and if I were forced to wear one again, I’d opt for the flowers. I have a newfound understanding of the fact that a model can make almost anything look chic, whereas I certainly can’t. Perhaps these trends should stay in the 4x4 squares of social media, where they belong.

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Cancer. Not a word I thought I’d have to deal with at 29 years of age.

I was diagnosed with stage four non small cell lung cancer in April this year and in that moment, my whole life changed. I’d always been fit and healthy. I was active, ambitious and career-driven. I began experiencing upper back pain in March – the first symptom that anything was wrong – but I just put it down to my busy lifestyle. Within a couple of weeks, my upper chest was visibly swollen; this is when I knew something wasn’t right. The swelling got so bad I was struggling to breathe and so, at the recommendation of my GP, I made a trip to A&E. My partner and I were even joking in the waiting room, laughing at how my appearance had changed so significantly, as my face had swelled up too. We didn’t expect to hear the word 'cancer'. My diagnosis came as a complete shock to me, and my family.

I’m a second-generation immigrant. My mother was born in Pakistan and came to England in the 1980s. In south Asian culture, people are determined to present the very best versions of their lives. Perception is everything. Talking about health is a massive taboo, because this goes against everything they believe in. Illness is not part of the picture.

Health issues are often hidden and rarely discussed. You’d only hear of someone’s ill health in a gossipy context. It’s always through word of mouth, never directly from the person or family. This is why I believe there’s such a gap in south Asians' knowledge of health. They don’t want to accept that diseases like cancer can happen. Growing up, this mentality rubbed off on me. I just assumed cancer was something that would never affect me. My mother didn’t even know what it was.

Yet now I’m a 29-year-old living with cancer. How do you explain to your mum, the woman you worship, that you have an incurable disease? One that she’d never even heard of? I really struggled to deliver that message. Translating the severity of my situation was so difficult. I almost envied her ignorance of the disease. The turning point in her understanding came when she said: "The spots are inside you." She was talking about my tumour.

I felt like I was letting my family down when I got my diagnosis. The mentality of shame is so prevalent in south Asia when it comes to illness and I had this outlook ingrained in my mind. Bound up in this are the implications of growing up as a second-generation immigrant. Coming from an immigrant family, you’re constantly having to prove yourself and your worth to society. I didn’t want to appear weak. Thoughts were constantly swirling in my head: What will people think, what will they say? I even suffered post-traumatic stress in the weeks following my diagnosis. The reality of my situation, though, was so far removed from the feelings that had dominated my mind. I've been lucky; my family have been so supportive, as have my friends. I have an incredible support network.

Before my diagnosis, the C-word had never been discussed in my family. I didn’t know anyone with cancer, it wasn’t hereditary and because I was so young, it wasn’t even remotely on my radar. Since I opened up, my aunt revealed that her mum had breast cancer, twice, in the past two decades. We had absolutely no idea. They’d kept it to themselves, not only while she was going through treatment but in the years since, when she’s been in remission. She also disclosed that her father, who recently passed away, died of bone cancer. Bad situations just aren’t discussed, even in the closest of families. I was truly astonished.

Now that’s all changed. I feel so passionately about encouraging people, especially those from an ethnic minority background, to step forward and tell their stories. Women have a hard time in south Asian culture. There’s a cultural conditioning, whereby women are seen as inferior to men. I want to change that, to help women feel able to speak out and share their experiences. To break the taboo surrounding health in south Asian and immigrant culture.

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At the recommendation of a close friend I decided to start a blog: Curry and Cancer. My mum and I set up a restaurant, Masala Wala, in southeast London almost four years ago and being able to combine my two worlds – as a restaurateur and cancer patient – has provided me with a sense of normality again. More conversation is needed to break that shame mentality. I wanted to show people the realities of living with cancer and that a diagnosis doesn’t have to define you. It’s been so therapeutic for me, and my family have been incredibly encouraging. It’s been healing for all of us, to be able to talk more openly and share our emotions.

I still wake up some mornings and can’t believe that cancer has happened to me. It’s extremely rare for someone my age to be diagnosed with lung cancer; the majority of people are over 60. But cancer is a disease that is faceless, raceless and ageless. I’m slowly learning to live with it. At the moment my health is stable, and I'm receiving palliative treatment in the form of targeted therapy. I take a chemotherapy pill called afatinib and I’ve had substantial tumour reductions. I’ve even managed to start exercising again. I also recently got married to the love of my life. It’s not how I expected to be going into my 30s, but I’m going to work with the situation I’ve been given; as a British Pakistani restaurateur with lung cancer. I’m determined to live my life.

Saima is supporting Stand Up To Cancer, a campaign from Cancer Research UK and Channel 4 to accelerate groundbreaking cancer research and save lives. Check out her blog here and her restaurant here.

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If you couldn't already tell by the title of Jonah Hill's directorial debut, mid90s, the movie is a throwback to the decade of teenage angst. But we're not talking about the Clueless kind, with Alaïa dresses and scrunchies everywhere. For Hill, the decade was mostly spent inside an L.A. skate shop, listening to A Tribe Called Quest and wearing éS SAL 23s. This movie isn't for the Cher Horowitzs of the worlds, but for the young Jonahs who found solace in a community of outcasts.

For Hill to tell the story just right, the cast, the music, and the fashion had to be believable — and the hair played a major role in that. Even for a movie that employed young skaters as amateur actors, Hill hired a trusted hair team, headed by Lori Guidroz, to make the sure that even the smallest details (like Stevie’s shag or Ruben's buzzcut) felt authentic. So, how did they get the skating subculture right when it's so often inaccurately portrayed onscreen? We asked Guidroz — and she answered.

Guidroz shares her personal relationship to skater hair, the real story behind Lucas Hedges' eyelashes, and Hill's acute attention to detail, ahead.

Warning: This story contains spoilers for mid90s.

This film bleeds '90s skate culture. How did you make sure it was authentic to not only a specific group of people, but also to one particular decade?
"What was so funny about it all is my boyfriend, Rodney Mullen, is a pro skateboarder. I used him sort of like a model throughout the film. It's always fun to do a period film and even more fun to do one with Jonah because he's so specific about every detail. He really didn't want this to be a movie about '90s hair porn or have someone watch it and say, 'Oh, that's '90s hair.' He collaborated with production design, wardrobe, and myself to make sure everything would blend and be subtle. The story had to drive the movie, not anyone's look in particular."

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How did you recreate '90s skater hair?
"I really looked to religious skaters to guide my hand and make the characters unique and individual, but still function together and seem real. Sometimes people on the outskirts of the skating subculture think they have to create this certain look. But the real hardcore skaters, like Tony Hawk, didn't put all that attention on their hair, but on their skills. My boyfriend also had a lot of old magazines, so I pulled from archives to make inspiration boards for Jonah to see."

Sunny Suljic's character, Stevie, has amazing hair. Is there a reason you kept it so long?
"My boyfriend had that longer look when he was younger, so I wanted Stevie's hair to look really grown out, too. Sunny would come in first thing in the morning, straight out of bed every day and look like a madman. I'd wet his hair, style it, and then unstyle it because it couldn't look done or like he'd been in a hair chair all morning."

Na-Kel Smith, who plays Ray, is a pro skater in real life. Did you change his look at all?
"No, he came in and we left his hair as is. I did do some research on Black skaters from the '90s, like Kareem Campbell, because, again, we really tried to keep it real."

Was there anyone's hair you did have to change for the film?
"I decided to buzz Gio Galicia's hair for his character Ruben. His hair was really long in real life, but I pitched to Jonah that we should cut it really short and he agreed. At first, Gio was like, 'I'm not cutting my hair. I'm not cutting my hair!' But Jonah finally convinced him that he was an actor and it'll grow back. Actually, I had Jonah do the first few buzzes on Gio's head to get him more comfortable with it before we cut it all off."

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Lucas Hedges also looked very different in this movie thanks to his darker hair. What was his routine like?
"Lucas is the sweetest, softest person, ever. Since he has natural strawberry-blonde hair, light eyebrows, and even lighter eyelashes, we had to dye it all. He had to look as dark as his character, who really was this menacing prick. I had to tell Lucas to not wash his hair so often because the colour we used washed out so easily. I dyed it at least five or six times while filming."

Leaving the theatre, I heard everyone talking about Olan Prenatt 's gorgeous hair. Is it really that beautiful in real life?
"Oh, he showed up with the most beautiful hair. I can't take any credit for that. Jonah wanted him to keep that hair. He had the most hair out of all the boys, but he didn't take too long to get ready for set. I'd always put a little something in everyone's hair just so they felt like they were being taken care of; I liked to specifically use this hair bar I make on Olan's curls. It's a mix of beeswax and cocoa shea butter, so it really made his hair look a little unclean and less fuzzy."

How did you handle the scenes leading up to the car accident? It looked brutally hot out that day...
"I had to wet them all down with water because the weather would fluctuate so much. I wanted it to feel like they were really sweating, drinking, and just a mess. So, I'd mist Sunny down and wet along his hairline, so it'd feel like he was skating all day in the sun. There were other times when we would have them driving around and it would just have to be what is was. Jonah didn't want the kids to feel like they were in the movie and have them touched up over and over again. He wanted to capture their real moments."

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Launched in Somerset in the West Country in 1971 (with a £500 loan from a mother to her enterprising son), the British luxury brand and leather goods specialist Mulberry may not be as gargantuan as the designer labels grouped under the LVMH or Kering umbrellas, but it can proudly lay claim to producing one of the most famous and successful handbag designs of all time: the Bayswater. Created by Nicholas Knightly and launched in 2003, the Bayswater became a major player in the early '00s 'It Bag' era (one of the more dizzyingly hysterical recent fashion periods, and a precursor to the current 'ugly trainer' epidemic). The first British bag to achieve such coveted status, Mulberry's Bayswater gained a strong following among A-listers and wealthy consumers, but its sub-£1,000 pricing also made it an aspirational luxury purchase accessible to fashion fans with more average budgets.

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The opposite of a fast fashion flash in the pan, the Bayswater has become an enduring classic for Mulberry. As later Mulberry creative director Emma Hill once put it: "I have a Bayswater, my son's grandmother has a Bayswater, Kate Moss has a Bayswater." The structured and unfussy design has been likened to old-school doctors' bags, but it manages – paradoxically – to also be soft and accommodating, with an expandable concertina structure and iconic postman's lock fastening. Its influence can easily be seen in Hill's own 'It Bag' moments: the Alexa, a school satchel style named after Alexa Chung; and the Del Rey, an old Hollywood glam style in honour of Lana Del Rey.

Every subsequent Mulberry creative director has put their unique spin on the Bayswater, and current creative director Johnny Coca is no exception. Speaking candidly about the issues he wanted to address in 2016, Coca told The Telegraph: "The [Bayswater’s] internal pocket is at the back, so you can’t reach into it so easily. The straps make it heavy and a bit clumsy at the sides… The hardware is dull looking, the padlock is unnecessary." It may seem a brutal assessment, but Coca's updated Bayswater was respectful to the iconic design, while fixing those few niggling negatives. Its launch last year caused Mulberry’s profits to rise 21% – a welcome good-news story for the company after a previous chief exec’s pivot to ultra luxury (with bags costing over £7,000) had alienated the accessible luxury market.

In 2018, Mulberry is again looking for a smash hit. When major British stockist House Of Fraser went into administration earlier this year (with store closures and an uncertain future under new owner Mike Ashley of Sports Direct), Mulberry was owed £2.4 million by the retailer (which Ashley doesn't have to pay back), and it was forced to issue a profit warning. But if anyone can deliver the next Bayswater, Johnny Coca is an excellent candidate. Born in Seville, in southern Spain, Coca studied and worked in interior design before taking a job as a window dresser at Louis Vuitton, where, after just a few weeks, he was transferred to the design team, working on bags. At 24 years old, Coca had his first hit with the Vuitton Musette; later, after moving to Celine, he worked on Michael Kors' hit Boogie Bag, and the Trio (a simple, three-pocketed zip bag) under Phoebe Philo.

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"A great bag needs good design, good functionality, good quality materials," Coca tells Refinery29. "The Bayswater is an iconic style for Mulberry and is a style that I really love because it’s easy, functional and has nice proportions," he explains. "I want to make things that people desire, that people use, things that they will keep and things that will be part of their lives." Enter the Hampstead, a new handbag style designed by Coca that launches this week in store and online. Debuted as part of Mulberry’s Spring Summer 19 collection, the Hampstead continues the brand’s traditional mix of English heritage and modern luxury. "Play with the classic, twist the conventional, use the familiar to make something inspiring and new," as Coca puts it.

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"For this new season, I was looking at a defining moment in British culture – the Swinging Sixties, and its hedonistic and iconic imagery," Coca says. "I wanted something fun, dynamic, lighthearted, candid, graphic and pop. It’s a collection that revisits the spirit of the '60s with the attitude of today." The handbag is named after Hampstead Ponds – the historic open-air swimming pools in north London – and seeks to reflect "the hedonistic love of leisure and the easy-wear fashion" of '60s Britain. A pleasingly boxy bucket bag with a small top handle as well as a detachable shoulder strap, the Hampstead is made from soft leather and closes with drawstrings fed through an adapted rider’s lock – a recent Mulberry signature. Made from 34 different pattern pieces, each bag takes Mulberry’s craftspeople four hours to hand-make.

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In an age of fast fashion and devastating over-consumption, Mulberry’s dedication to quality handmade luxury products, which are expected to last, is refreshing. "Sustainability is an essential question in all industries worldwide, and we are all responsible for ensuring that manufacturing processes evolve the right way," Coca says. "As a designer, I try and make the small changes I can for the environment such as keeping over 50% of our products to be made in England by local craftspeople rather than have them made overseas, which would have a heavier ecological impact." (In 2006, the brand launched an apprenticeship scheme with a local Somerset college, training a new generation of skilled craftspeople.)

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While the heady success of the Bayswater would likely be difficult to replicate – following the global recession, UK austerity, and amid ongoing Brexit shambles – the Hampstead is certainly a contender. With a large version retailing at £995, and a cute smaller option for £795, the bag is certainly a luxury item, but one that is in reach for many consumers who want to buy luxury but wouldn’t spend multiple thousands. With a range of playful, interchangeable shoulder straps (starting from £75) available to buy, the Hampstead is exactly the kind of chic, fun and affordable style that can set fashion Instagram on fire. For extra fearless fashion points, shoots should coincide with a winter dip in Hampstead Heath Ladies Pond.

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Today, Twitter announced that it is rethinking everything, including the future of the "like" button, in an effort to incentivise "healthy conversation" on the social media platform.

At a company event last week, founder Jack Dorsey said that he planned to get rid of the identifying feature "soon," reports the Telegraph. Dorsey went one step further to say that he "was not a fan of the heart-shaped button."

The future of the button was also addressed by the Twitter communications team in a tweet which read:

"As we've been saying for a while, we are rethinking everything about the service to ensure we are incentivising healthy conversation, that includes the like button. We are in the early stages of the work and have no plans to share right now."

As we've been saying for a while, we are rethinking everything about the service to ensure we are incentivizing healthy conversation, that includes the like button. We are in the early stages of the work and have no plans to share right now. https://t.co/k5uPe5j4CW

— Twitter Comms (@TwitterComms) October 29, 2018

We first got a glimpse of Dorsey's opinions on his own and other similar platforms in a recent text conversation with Kanye West. In a now deleted Instagram post, Dorsey agreed with West about some of the toxic aspects of vanity metrics and follower culture saying, “We want to incentivise contribution to the global conversation and consciousness.”

Twitter has been in the news repeatedly as its users question why the platform continues to verify accounts of known white supremacists while failing to consistently address accounts espousing hate-filled ideologies that are racist, antisemitic, and homophobic. Rather than removing reportable rhetoric, this design shift to promote healthy debate would make it less publicly known who supports questionable tweets which have been a proven precursor to dangerous behaviour, as was the case with the mail bomb suspect, Cesar Altieri Sayoc. On one hand, it would give less of a publicised platform to hateful tweets. Currently, likes are public. The move would also raise questions about how Twitter prioritises and promotes tweets.

The like button has taken on various forms over the years. Originally in the shape of a star to favourite tweets, the heart-shaped like button was added as a replacement in 2015. “Us making that number bold and big incentivises people to want to increase it, and feel bad if they couldn’t. That’s not right," Dorsey continued. But the toxicity has gone beyond comparison and social pressure as people take their opinions offline and into the real world.

Twitter users aren't excited about the news. Many see it as attempting to fix a non-issue while ignoring bigger, more glaring problems.

Finally. Twitter is getting rid of the biggest problem on their platform - the LIKE button!!! We’ve all had enough verbal harassment, death or rape threats from that LIKE button. It’s time the LIKE button went. Cuz that sure is Twitter’s biggest problem, the LIKE button. @jack

— JEN KIRKMAN (@JenKirkman) October 29, 2018

Users: hey can you get rid of the Nazis please

Twitter: ok sure, we've changed the stars to hearts for likes

Users: no no, zero Nazis please

Twitter: yep we're getting rid of Vine

Users: nah hey, what about the Nazis

Twitter: ok ok fine, no more likes https://t.co/HKE0BrCiVU

— Josh Butler (@JoshButler) October 29, 2018

When twitter removes the like button instead of the Nazi’s pic.twitter.com/UCNrkXu542

— Matthew A. Cherry (@MatthewACherry) October 29, 2018

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Of all the trendy plants — we're talking fiddle leaf figs, cute little cacti, etc. — succulents just might be the trendiest. Maybe it's their vaguely prehistoric looks or the fact that they're easier to keep alive than most of their viridescent brethren, but the love for these plants is real. So real, in fact, that there's a sizeable Instagram subculture dedicated to sharing images of them. Welcome, my friends, to Succugram.

Seriously, succulents just may have more fan accounts than Beyonce and Ariana Grande combined. So if your feed is feeling in need of a little something green and leafy, read on for our recommendations of which ones to follow. Just remember: Digital succulent super-fandom is weirdly habit-forming. If you suddenly find yourself waking in the middle of the night to view (or post) images of out-of-this-world succulents, well, don't say we didn't warn you.

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Carey Mulligan has joined the long line of women dissatisfied with the cost of childcare available to working mothers. She described it as "so expensive" and said it was "incredibly difficult" being a mother working in film and TV.

The 33-year-old British actor, who has two young children with husband Marcus Mumford, said she'd never worked anywhere with on-set childcare and described film and TV environments as "limiting" for mothers.

"I don’t think being a working mother in our industry has been made that much easier. It’s incredibly difficult. Childcare is so expensive," she told the Radio Times. "I’ve never, ever been on a set where they have childcare, but I’ve been on lots of sets where lots of people have very young children … I had my daughter on the set of [the films] Mudbound and Wildlife and loads of the crew had kids, but they had to arrange childcare. It’s always incredibly complicated."

If on-set childcare were available, Mulligan continued, "it would make it possible for a lot of talented people to come and do their job." She added: "At the moment, it's limiting."

Mulligan and Mumford's first child, Evelyn, was born in September 2015 and accompanied her on set of 2017 Oscar-nominated film Mudbound. Mulligan filmed this year's BBC Two drama Collateral while pregnant with the couple's second child, Wilfred (who was born in 2017), after programme writer Sir David Hare made her character pregnant in a rewrite, reported the BBC.

Mulligan also said the industry wasn't accepting enough of pregnant actors. "I don't think we're at the level where it's acceptable across the board yet. I think if people can hide it, they do," she told the magazine.

Mulligan joins Keira Knightley in her dissatisfaction with the state of childcare, and in her openness in sharing the difficulty of balancing parenting with an acting career. In an interview in 2016, the actor described UK childcare as "unbelievably expensive" and said she'd "become unbelievably aware" of how lucky she was "to be able to afford really good childcare" since becoming a parent.

"Because otherwise it would be at least four years out of my career," she added.

A report last month found that the rise in childcare costs in the UK is far outstripping wage rises. Childcare fees have soared by 52% over the past decade, compared with a 17% rise in earnings over that period, the Trades Union Congress found.

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Bring on the cold. Rephrase: Bring on Autumn/Winter 2018 and its lineup of hot trends, because we’ve got a rail of brightly coloured tweeds and blanket capes to wear. With that in mind, we've rounded up the most compelling trends to keep you wrapped up in style this season. And because no outfit is complete without the magical change-a-look-in-seconds accessory, we’ve teamed up with Charles & Keith (Molly Goddard's go-to for her SS19 show) to suggest the perfect finishing touches, from winter’s must-have white mule to a totally 'grammable glitzy bag.

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